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Horrible HistoriesHorrible Histories

Horrible Histories

Issue 59

Horrible Histories magazine is the funniest, foulest and goriest magazine you’ll ever see! If you dare, you’ll discover so much stuff about the awful Egyptians, rotten Romans, terrible Tudors, vile Victorians and more that you’ll become a horrible expert! Join TV star Rattus and the gang and begin a journey through the putrid past – all the gore and more!

United Kingdom
Immediate Media Company London Limited
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“Since the dawn of time, snappy, slimy and scary animals like yours truly have changed the course of history! So step aside, horrible humans – there’s a special section in this mag, all about us!” ■...

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on this horrible day…

7 Sep, 1533 A fresh-faced Elizabeth I is born – not so fresh later in life, when her white face paint ate into her skin! 15 Sep, 1916 A tank was used in battle for the first time by the Brits in the First World War. The first model was called ‘Little Willie’! 16 Sep, 1420 Spanish torturer Tomás de Torquemada is born. Instead of birthday candles, he’ll spend his life burning people – 2,000 of them. 20 Sep, 1519 Portuguese sailor Ferdinand Magellan sets sail for China with 237 men – but not enough food. Just 18 get home. Magellan isn’t one of...

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the necks factor!

ANNE BOLEYN Got the chop in: 1536 Sob story: With no baby boy after three years of marriage, Henry VIII sent her for the chop – saying she had five boyfriends. But he was kind and got an expert swordsman so her head would come off quicker! MARIE ANTOINETTE Got the chop in: 1793 Sob story: She didn’t get the public vote! The peckish and poor people of France revolted against King Louis XVI (not Louis Walsh,) and Queen Marie, sending them to the guillotine. WILLIAM WALLACE Got the chop in: 1305 Sob story: Wallace's fight for Scottish independence came to a sticky end. He...

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on this horrible day…

3 Oct, 1720 Halloween comes early. Peter the Great of Russia has his girlfriend’s lover killed – and keeps his head in a jar in their room! 6 Oct, 1014 The Bulgarian army return home from a defeat to Byzantine Emperor Basil II – minus their eyes. Basil had them blinded! 10 Oct, 1808 Two men in France fall out, so have a pistol duel – in hot air balloons! They fire until one tumbles to his death. Splat. 16 Oct, 1408 Another foul French trial is held for the killing of a child. The defendant? A PIG! The porker is found guilty and...

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the necks factor judges!

1 HENRY VIII Fear Factor: Tens of thousands were executed under his reign. Who did he send to death? 2 ELIZABETH I Fear Factor: Walked around her palace carrying a rusty sword. Who did she send to death? 3 EDWARD I Fear Factor: He went to war with France, Scotland and Wales. Who did he send to death? 4 MAX ROBESPIERRE Fear Factor: Led a revolution, killing anyone who complained. Who did he send to death? ■...

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deadly dot-to-dot

Norman soldiers could be very ruthless – and if they set fire to the thatch on your cottage, you’d be very ‘roofless’, too! In Norman times, young children had a tough life. Tick the awful jobs you think they had to do… Prod an ox in the bum with a sharp stick Polish the arrowheads of their dad’s arrows Cook frog’s legs and cowpats for the rich Collect firewood from the forest (watch out for wolves!) TOP TIP When you get to a number with a star next to it, lift up your pencil and start again at the next red number! ■...