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The PictureThe Picture

The Picture Issue 1920

The Picture is an Australian men’s magazine aimed at the average bloke. It’s full of local stories, nude women, puzzles, prizes and jokes.

Country:
Australia
Language:
English
Publisher:
Bauer Media Pty Ltd
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26 Issues

IN THIS ISSUE

access_time1 min.
funny fucker!

HAVE you heard the one about the porn star comedian? You’ll either pitch a tent in your pants, or piss them laughing! Seppo mattress actress Silvia Paige juggles her two careers, rooting up a storm then hitting the comedy clubs – it’s lie-down all day and stand-up at night! The 35-year-old came to LA five years ago to pursue her dream of becoming a comedian, and took up porn to pay the bills. Now she rattles off heaps of jokes in her act about what it’s like to root blokes who are hung like a Pringles can. Well, you probably have to be there. But hey, yucks and fucks, readers – ya can’t beat that combo!…

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reade all about it

SO YOU think you’ve seen Pommy spunk Sophie Reade every which way but loose, every photo, in every pose, from every angle possible? Think again, amigos. Somehow these particular dick-tickling pics of the big-boobed legend have escaped our attention up until now. Yeah, that’s right – they’ve NEVER BEFORE been published in our wide brown land. So we’re bringing them to YOU, the loyal readers of THE PICTURE, for the FIRST FUCKING TIME, in all their blonde, mega-norked beautness. No need to thank us – well, not YET, anyway. Just lie back and enjoy. We’ll let you know where to post the gold doubloons later.…

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wobbly world

BALI! Sensual Jane is the stage name of this Romanian porn star and model. Her double Ds have helped earn her a fortune, so they deserve this holiday in Bali. LOS ANGELES! Mia Malkova (far right) earns a good wage as a porn star, but her side gig is washing cars. We’re gunna chuck her a tenner and ask her to hose down the Commodore. CALIFORNIA! It’s nice of Reese to flash her puppies on the bike trail, but they probably had to call the ambos to take care of all the blokes who crashed into rocks and cactuses. MENORCA! Pommy topless legend Sammy Braddy may be 34 but her tits are ageless. After 13 years of modelling they still look as perky as ever. Must be all that sunshine and fresh air. BRATISLAVA! Anata was sick of blokes…

access_time2 min.
news flash

BLOKE VS BEAR ACANADIAN numbskull has been fined Oz $4400 for trying to PUNCH ON with a grizzly bear. Devin Mitsuing was a few rums deep when he got out of his truck in the Banff National Park and started yelling at the startled bear, then put up his fists and charged at it. Some wildlife photographers just happened to be nearby and got it on film. When police questioned Mitsuing about it later he said: “I was just fucking around... I thought it was a brown bear.” Yeah, like that makes a LOT more sense. PORN BALL! THE basketball arena that is home to the NBA’s Miami Heat may soon be named after a porno production company. When the naming rights, previously held by American Airlines, CAME on the market BangBros offered…

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animal frights!

TAPIR Our advice is never invite one of these ugly bastards to a party. It’ll snort up all ya drugs in one go, then shag your girlfriend and steal your iPhone. GRIFFIN’S LEAF-NOSED BAT Only found in a couple of locations in Vietnam, it’s so ugly that even Charlie Sheen refused to fuck one. Nah, who 10 are we kidding – of course he did! PENIS SNAKE They usually HANG OUT in streams deep in the Brazilian rainforest, but they also occasionally POP UP at hen’s parties, male strip clubs, etc. BLOBFISH When these guys are brought up from 2000-metres below sea-level they expand due to the reduction in pressure and get seriously uggo! GOBLIN SHARK They hang around on the bottom of the ocean more than 100-metres beneath the surface, presumably feeding on deep-sea diving hobbits. SNUB-NOSED MONKEY These monkeys…

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natural wonders!

IT WAS a great day for the boob-loving world when Tessa Fowler quit her job at a Hooters in South Carolina, USA, to take up an offer to model for Playboy. Sure, the customers at that particular Hooters outlet must’ve had the shits, but for the rest of us it’s been great, so fuck ‘em. That was eight years ago, and she hasn’t looked back since. Armed with her mighty all-natural double-G gazongas and dick-hardening smile, Tessa has become one of the internet’s favourite big-boobed babes. And, importantly, she never forgets what got her there. “I call the left one ‘Sparkling Wit’ and the right one ‘Charming Personality’,” she explains, referring to her bodacious boobsters. That’s right – she’s got a sense of humour, too! “The best pickup line I’ve ever heard was, ‘Is that a keg…

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