Real People Issue 19 2021

Real People is a real-life title which delivers real-life stories, puzzles (and prizes) and affordable practical advice (food, fashion & beauty).

United Kingdom
Hearst Magazines UK
52 号


this week in your fab value

Mums don’t get to be squeamish. Any queasiness about bodily functions doesn’t make it past the pregnancy, never mind the birth! Then there are the fully-loaded nappies, the midnight projectile vomiting, the bits of Lego stuffed up noses and various other scrapes and bugs and nasties. What can you do?! Laugh your way through it, that’s all. Yet what happened to mum Gemma would test even the strongest stomach, I think (p38). It started with her lad, Ashton, having a bit of earache. ‘Wax,’ she decided, having a good look then a rummage. She grabbed a wodge of it with tweezers and out it came… and came… and CAME… It was a flippin’ horror show. You might be a mum who’s seen it all – worms, nits, eruptions from both ends…

our mad world!

Cute TOT WAT-ER HONEY One month old and ready to make her splash on the world, my third daughter Nora loves her baths. Erin Townsend, Weston-super-Mare, Somerset ITALY A Mafia fugitive was caught after being spotted on a YouTube cooking channel he started with his wife while on the run for seven years. Though careful to hide his face from cameras, his tattoos gave him away to cops. PUPPY LOVE Don’t dogs look like their owners?! I met my brother James and his new Frenchie Sonny at our local park, and the daft pair are two peas in a pod! Heather Sutcliffe, Hebden Bridge, West Yorks SIGN OF THE TIMES Move over grandma! If you use these emojis you’re old... ● Thumbs up ● Red heart ● OK hand ● Check mark ● Poo ● Loudly crying face ● Monkey covering eyes ● Clappy hands ● Kiss mark ● Grimacing…

school’s out forever

The music pumped through the school hall. I turned in time, completely lost in the moment. ‘Brilliant!’ my teacher smiled. ‘Everyone, watch Alison.’ Glowing with pride, I continued the routine. At the end of the class, the teacher came up to me. ‘Keep up the good work,’ she said. ‘I will,’ I promised. And I would. Because that was me. I was 15, a grade-A student, good at dance and every kind of sport. Leaving school, some of my mates came up to me. ‘We’re heading to the park, coming?’ ‘No, I promised Mum I’d go straight home,’ I said. ‘See you tomorrow.’ Back home, my mum, Julie, was cooking tea. The smell of chicken pie filled the kitchen. ‘Hi, love,’ she smiled. ‘How was your day?’ ‘Good,’ I grinned. ‘The dance teacher was really pleased with me.’ ‘That’s my girl,’…

the bell tolls

Through watery eyes, I read how he’d been initially arrested for possessing 600 indecent images in an online police sting. Officers had then found videos on his phone of him having sex with four girls aged 13 to 15. They’d never been identified. They’d be living with this horror like me... Paul had been jailed for 11 years in 2015 for sexually abusing and raping an 11-year-old girl he’d groomed online. My head sunk. If I’d come forward at the time, maybe none of this would’ve happened. The guilt burned. But I could make amends now. I called my local police station. ‘I was raped when I was a teenager,’ I managed to choke out. The first person to hear those words leave my mouth was an operator. He said they’d send an officer round in the morning. Then…


1 In Italian cuisine, what is a cheese and tomato pizza called? 2 Find three Greek gods. Bread 3 Selina Kyle is the alter ego of which Batman villain? P ecorino 4 In Italian cuisine, what is the name of the dish that consists of alternate layers of pasta and meat in a tomato sauce and béchamel sauce? 5 Which royal couple celebrated 10 years of marriage last week? 6 What song includes the lyrics, ‘Slip inside the eye of your mind, Don’t you know you might find, A better place to play…’? 7 Mark Drakeford is the First Minister of what UK country? 8 In Italian cuisine, fusilli, tagliatelle and penne are all types of what? 9 Complete the joke: What did Obi-Wan Kenobi say to Luke at dinner time? 10 Which hugely successful singer-songwriter has so far…

plane terrifying

A flash of my boarding card and the air stewardess greeted me with a practiced smile. ‘I’ll take that for you,’ she beamed, carefully taking hold of my very special hand luggage. The 6ft long garment bag contained my wedding dress. Alas, it had to go in the overhead locker, but she very carefully laid it over the other luggage. Leaving my hometown of Seattle for Cancún, Mexico, in April 2015, it was just five days until I’d be Mrs Hoffman. I could hardly believe it. Even the thought made me giddy. The big day for me and my husband-to-be, 36-year-old Court, had been a long time coming. After meeting in 2007, we’d discovered a shared love of travel and quickly headed on the first of many trips to Mexico’s Playa del Carmen, near Cancún. Soon we were…