New Zealand Listener Issue 31 2019

The cricket aficionados are bickering and some bookies are even refunding bets, but it behoves New Zealanders to take a generous view of our recent cricketing loss to England. It’s not just that we’d barely even dreamt we’d get to the Cricket World Cup final in the first place; and it’s not even the frustration of losing in a tiebreaker after such a valiant campaign by the Black Caps. We need to remember that the UK is in such terrible shape politically, its foot hovering over an abyss of economic uncertainty, that it needs to cherish this flickering flame of good news while it can. In the spectacle of UK politics these past three years, the stagger-a-thon towards leaving the European Union is by no means the only source of international embarrassment.…

The July 20 Editorial (“Vehicles for change”) suggests it would take a psychologist to explain why so many utes have been sold to people who have no actual need for these commercial vehicles. Though totally unqualified, I’ll offer a humble opinion. It seems, from my observation, that many have been bought by overgrown little boys who like to lumber around in their overgrown toy truck while fondly imagining that this makes them into a “real bloke”. Martin Green(Whangārei) “Vehicles for change” sounds more like “no change at all”, or, at least, not if it’s going to make us suffer any discomfort. The buyers of Ford Rangers and Toyota Hiluxes are causing future harm to us all, including their own children. Surely fairness demands the incentivising of electric vehicles and a penalty for…

Mike Lynch, Upper Hutt FINALISTS Donald Trump: “Thanks, but Putin is already giving me a hand.” — Ricky Feutz, Tauranga Trump: “We had a president called Abe once. He was a loser, like all of them before me.” — Keith Davidson Trump: “What makes you think nepotism could come between us?” — Steve Godsiff, Timaru Trump: “We call it a ‘photobomb’ – she’s quite harmless.” — Roger Reeves, Palmerston North Trump: “Our Children in the Workplace Policy really works.” — Hans Zindel, Palmerston North Caption: “Japan-US alliance unshakeable.” — Marie Curran, Dunedin Trump: “Sure, I can fix your whaling problem. The Prince of Whales is a very good friend of mine.” — Dean Donoghue, Papamoa Beach Shinzō Abe: “Abe.” Ivanka: “Wannabe.” — Anne Neale, Nelson Trump: “Actually, she flattens to nothing in my luggage.” — Kath Jones, Waikanae Trump: “Ivanka’s translation…

“Regarding Meng Foon: the media don’t seem to ask whether he has any background in squash at all, even at a junior or inter-club level. WHAT ARE HIS QUALIFICATIONS?” – Raybon Kan on the new Race Relations Commissioner“He will still work with Apple but will need a special adapter.” – tweet in reference to departing Apple designer Jony Ive“Sports do not build character. They reveal it.” – US journalist Heywood Broun“When heiress Barbara Hutton and Cary Grant married, they were dubbed Cash & Cary.” – the Washington Post“The difference between successful people and others is how long they spend feeling sorry for themselves.” – US columnist Barbara Corcoran, quoted in the Week“To be astonished is one of the surest ways of not growing old too quickly.”– Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette, quoted in…

Another wave of children in the Taupō district will benefit from free swimming and water safety lessons after Contact extended its sponsorship of the Swill Well Taupō programme. Taupō Times, 25/6/19 And yes – it does look like the weather will stay away. NZ Herald, 10/7/19 Hugo notices these atheistically-pleasing details. Otago Daily Times, 2/7/19 Pipe repair work starts after mayor sewage leak into Lake Taupō rnz.co.nz, 8/7/19 “It’s the first thing you do as a parent. You get up in the morning and put a rag in your pocket.” Sunday Star-Times, 19/5/19 Nine peacocks were relocated from the Port Hills on Monday after five were shot last month. Bay Harbour News, 12/6/19 LIFE IN NEW ZEALAND: Entries must describe New Zealand events. The first sender of those accepted will receive a $5 Booksellers voucher. Enclose name, address and source/date; TV and…

1. What kind of object was used in the longest recorded throw by a human? ❑ Javelin ❑ Flying disc❑ Paper aeroplane ❑ Boomerang 2. Which of these film adaptations of John Grisham novels stars Julia Roberts and Denzel Washington? ❑ The Client❑ A Time to Kill ❑ The Pelican Brief❑ The Firm 3. Who promised: “I have said this before, but I shall say it again and again and again: your boys are not going to be sent into any foreign war.”? ❑ Franklin D Roosevelt ❑ Margaret Thatcher❑ Winston Churchill❑ George W Bush 4. True or false? It’s possible to die from excessive laughter. ❑ True ❑ False 5. What 1960s invention was initially described as an “X-Y position indicator for a display system”? ❑ Touchscreen ❑ Computer mouse ❑ Joystick ❑ Keyboard 6. What was the band…