New Zealand Listener Issue 40 2019

People may have been doing it since about 5000BC, but those early humans at least had the excuse that no public health messages warned against deliberately inhaling burning substances. The emerging evidence that at least one ingredient commonly found in e-cigarettes may be deadly has understandably dismayed those addicts who have found inhaling nicotine vapour a healthier alternative to smoking cigarettes. Now that US health authorities have documented at least seven deaths and several hundred lung ailments linked to e-cigarettes, vapers are breathing less easily. US President Donald Trump’s pledge to ban e-cigarettes with flavourings, because of their well-charted appeal to children and teens, may be the only non-controversial statement he has made since taking office. Despite the shock of vaping’s apparent potential to cause deaths, and so quickly, the question is not…

There are many reasons Peter Ellis cannot possibly have done any of the things of which he was accused (“From the mouths of children”, September 21). One is that the workplace was so open that the staff could see what each other was doing at any time. So, we are asked to believe that he did these things while other adults watched and did nothing about it? To use a favourite cartoon character’s word – d’oh! John Allum (Thames) The Peter Ellis story begins by quoting Lynley Hood, the author of A City Possessed, which argued that he was the subject of a witch-hunt. Christchurch members of my family would say that Hood, not the city, was possessed. If the November court case does not turn out as Ellis’ friends are expecting, I hope they…

Phoebe Wray, Christchurch FINALISTS Barbara Windsor: “Bloody rude of you to start making Carry On Number 10 Downing Street without me.” – Claudia Freeman, Gisborne Caption: “Shaggy-dog owners explore pet-resemblance theory.” – Graeme Bulling, Auckland Windsor: “Boris, you’re sucking up to the wrong Windsor.” – Edith Macklin, Hastings Boris Johnson: “Who’s your hairdresser?” – PM Lynch, Upper Hutt Johnson: “Oops, somebody moved the goalposts again.” – Dennis Murrow, Hamilton Caption: “Johnson’s attempted advances still only met with lip service.” – Steve Godsiff, Timaru Windsor, thinking: “Thank God he missed!” – Richard McKernan, Wellington Caption: “A no-deal pecks-it.” – Jo Hammer, Auckland…

“New Zilders only have two vowels: u and u. Makes wunnung Scrubbul rully duffucult.” – publicist Paul Brislen“If Scotland is going to arrest the Queen, then it’s worth remembering that she can move diagonally, horizontally and vertically.”– poet Roseanne Watt“John Bolton was the third national security adviser Trump has pushed out. Honestly, it’s amazing that America’s unemployment numbers are so low, considering Trump has fired half of the country.”– the Daily Show’s Trevor Noah“My ancestors wandered in the wilderness for 40 years, because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask directions.” – US comedian Elayne Boosler“Apple said it takes such clear selfies, you’ll find chins you never knew you had.”– US comedian Jimmy Fallon on the new iPhone“If any of these women are elected, it would be…

A done deal: A contract to save 70 trees from the chop by moving them underground has been signed. Marlborough Weekly, 13/8/19 Mr Naude said the duel-entrances from Commerce Street and Margaret Mahy Square were a health and safety issue … Whakatane Beacon, 21/8/19 It asserted that sick people need to eat meat. This is hard to swallow from an organisation that is expounding outdated beliefs and is supported by Beef + Lamb NZ. Press, 20/8/19 McLister told the Akaroa Mail that he had flouted with the idea of running again. Akaroa Mail, 2/8/19 “It was just like a flare, heading east towards Oz, but it was white and just got bigger and bigger, and then kind of disintegrated.” NZ Herald, 9/9/19 LIFE IN NEW ZEALAND: Entries must describe New Zealand events. The first sender of those accepted will receive…

1. Which of these animal species is not a reptile? ❑ Gharial ❑ Caiman❑ Gila monster ❑ Jerboa 2. Which of these is a word for a small mountain lake? ❑ Moraine ❑ Tarn❑ Cirque❑ Bocage 3. True or false? Diving horses were once popular attractions at carnivals and theme parks. ❑ True❑ False 4. True or false? Neanderthals had larger brains, on average, than modern humans do. ❑ True❑ False 5. Whose book includes the line: “It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then”? ❑ Lewis Carroll❑ Roald Dahl❑ CS Lewis❑ Beatrix Potter 6. What was the original meaning of the phrase “in the buff”? ❑ To be a subject expert ❑ To wear a leather coat❑ To take a bath❑ To be physically fit 7. What is the only X-rated movie to win an…