New Zealand Listener Issue 49 2020

Shrek the lost sheep, with his colossal fleece from six years’ growth, became our cuddly mascot after his remarkable survival story in the wilds of Tarras. But unshorn sheep do not usually come to such a happy ending, as New Zealand now risks witnessing on an alarming scale. As a result of the Government’s reluctance to grant visas to shearers, unshorn sheep – suffering overheating, fly-strike and, in some cases, a painful death – are rapidly becoming the latest animal welfare problem facing this country, with attendant ethical and reputational issues. The pandemic-wrought shortage of shearers is on one level simply another example of an industry’s over-reliance on imported labour. Rather than ensure domestic shearing has a sustainable career path, the wool industry, like horticulture, has become dangerously dependent on seasonal labour…

One possibility to solve the housing problem is an optional tax (Editorial, November 28). Above a certain income, a tax cuts in, but instead of paying it to the IRD, the tax can be put into buying shares in new investments of taxpayers’ choosing. Obviously, the financial sector has to create the mechanism for carrying this out, but if it refuses, the Government can do it. The structure could be similar to KiwiSaver, but companies could also participate through special stock issues. As an example, for housing, the tax would buy a share in a new house, and when that is sold, the taxpayer receives their proportional share, tax-free. Because the system needs turnover, more effort would go into affordable houses. A good investment can get reasonable capital gains and shares can…

FINALISTS Prince William: “People tell me this is how to get a free ride.”– Robert Morey, DunedinWilliam: “Look, opposable thumbs!”– Simone Standfield, ChristchurchWilliam: “If one likes something, does one place one’s thumb on the side, or upward to express oneself?”– Sheila Bowen, WellingtonWills demonstrated his design for a new steering wheel, but his wife’s interest sparked only when he said its name – “the Catherine Wheel”.– Keith Davidson, BlenheimWilliam: “I floored the writer of The Crown with a right hook!”– Rex McGregor, AucklandKate: “I don’t think we should dispense with our security just yet.”– John Stribling, Wellington…

“The world is disgracefully managed; one hardly knows to whom to complain.”– Ronald Firbank“It’s been 17 days now since the election and Trump is still acting like a psycho beauty pageant queen who will not let go of the tiara.”– US comic Bill Maher“The long wait for an election result has at last given Americans an understanding of fiveday test cricket.”– seen on Twitter“They had a sign saying, ‘Dolly for president’, and I said ‘no thank you’. We’ve had enough boobs in the White House.”– Dolly Parton on RNZ“The difference between Parliament and theatre is that Parliament is underrehearsed and badly lit.”– Glenda Jackson, quoted in the Times“The Trump campaign keeps hoping it will find a judge that treats lawsuits like tweets.”– electoral law specialist Justin Levitt“The judge said, ‘Order…

1. Which US President’s middle name was Milhous, inspiring the naming of a character on The Simpsons? ▢ Truman▢ Nixon▢ Johnson▢ Roosevelt 2. Which book includes the line: “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast”? ▢ The Little Prince▢ Anne of Green Gables▢ Little Women▢ Through the Looking-Glass 3. Which of these oceanic dolphin species grows to the largest size? ▢ Killer whale/orca▢ Melon-headed whale▢ Pilot whale▢ False killer whale 4. Which film was promoted with the tagline “Her life was in their hands. Now her toe is in the mail”? ▢ Jackie Brown▢ The Big Lebowski▢ Chinatown▢ Fargo 5. Which of these European countries’ peoples was first to settle permanently in what’s now the US? ▢ England▢ Spain▢ France▢ Portugal 6. Which of these is not one of the four humours described by ancient…

The UK public are a sentimental lot. We can be philosophically accepting of teenage gang stabbings, widespread homelessness and lethal care homes, but nothing can be allowed to stop Christmas. Families coming together in the bleak midwinter to eat too much, drink too much and then argue is a sacred ritual that pays no mind to a global pandemic. Hence the Government has based its Covid policy around enabling a “normal Christmas”. Just seeing the phrase in print sends shivers down my spine, and not of excited anticipation. We are just about to emerge from our second national lockdown. It’s been very different from the first, which coincided with an unusually balmy spring. This one took place in a damp, dark winter and against a backdrop of prolonged boredom. First time around, the…