New Zealand Listener Issue 9 2021

As a country that prides itself on standing up to bullies and defending peace and democracy, New Zealand has had a nasty shock in finding out that not only its national airline but also its foreign ministry aren’t quite so bothered. Air New Zealand’s initially grudging admission that it has been doing military business with at least one country that is actively perpetrating aggressive acts on another was bad enough. That the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Trade (MFAT) appears to have ticked off at least two inappropriate deals is gravely concerning. The airline, which has hired consultants PwC for an urgent investigation, should be deeply embar-rassed that employees so senior as to be authorised to action multimillion-dollar deals are either ignorant of, or, worse, indifferent to the deeply held principles of…

As a Canterbury resident, I found the article on defying age ironic (“Stopping the clock”, February 13). New Zealand has one of the highest rates of colorectal cancer in the world, and Canterbury and South Canterbury have one of the highest rates of colorectal cancer in the country. In two large studies, colorectal cancer has been linked to high nitrate levels in drinking water. We have high levels of nitrates in Canterbury drinking water because of our gravelly soils, high use of nitrogen fertilisers (urea) and the number of cows allowed per hectare. When a cow urinates, the wee, with its nitrates, runs straight down into the underground rivers and lakes that hold our drinking water The studies that conclude a clear link between nitrate levels and cancer were done in Western…

WINNING CAPTION Rex McGregor, Auckland FINALISTS Yellow Wiggle: “Told you there would be Wiggle Room.” – Daniel Phillips, Invercargill Red Wiggle: “Really? We’ve gone viral?” – Steve Godsiff, Timaru Red Wiggle: “What’s a big chap like me doing in this red shirt? Well, it beats being Ben Ainslie any day! – Ann Love, Nelson Red Wiggle: “A horde of preschoolers was about to storm Parliament …” – Sheila Bowen, Thames Yellow Wiggle: “How the heck?” Red Wiggle : “Easy, I just said to her, ‘Think of the photo ops!’” – John Oliver, Auckland Red Wiggle: “And now for our reimagined classic, ‘Political Hot Potato’!” – Chris Curran, Wellington Yellow Wiggle: “This Wella Bold Celtic hair shade won’t last 14 days in isolation!” – Simone Stansfield, Taup?…

“There seems to be a feeling that anything that is natural is good. Strychnine is natural.” – Isaac Asimov “Nature abhors a lot of things, including vacuums, ships called the Mary Celeste and the chuck keys for electric drills.” – Terry Pratchett “Age gets better with wine.” – Instagram “Sometimes I get the feeling that the whole world is against me, but deep down, I know that’s not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.” – Robert Orben “People say Covid is nothing at all. A hole is nothing at all, but you can still break your neck in it.” – Twitter “In the Trump White House, the TVs had so much spittle on them, they came with wiper blades.” – Stephen Colbert “Republicans are like: ‘Wow, that defence of Trump was terrible. He couldn’t…

Who is faster, Usain Bolt or a fly? Usain Bolt is the fastest human ever. He could run 100m in just 9.58s, with a top speed of almost 45kph. If Bolt raced against a fly, his success would depend on the species of his opponent, as top speeds vary between flies. A housefly travels at about 6km/h, so the race would be a walk in the park for Usain. Horseflies, on the other hand, are much faster. When a male is chasing a female, it can reach 145km/h. Bolt has nothing on that. One candidate for an even faster insect is the deer botfly. In 1926, US scientist Charles Townsend claimed he had seen one travelling at more than 350m a second (that’s nearly 1300km/h, faster than the fastest passenger plane today).…

1. Which of these is a term sometimes associated with a tennis match? ❑ Bacon❑ Sausage❑ Bagel❑ Kipper 2. The 1987 film Roxanne, starring Daryl Hannah and Steve Martin, is a modern version of which play? ❑ The Lion in Winter❑ The Importance of Being Earnest❑ Antony and Cleopatra❑ Cyrano de Bergerac 3. Which of these medical advances was made by James Watson and Francis Crick in 1953? ❑ First organ transplant❑ Antibiotics discovery❑ Iron lung invention❑ DNA double helix discovery 4. Which country has the world’s longest coastline? ❑ Canada❑ Australia❑ Philippines❑ New Zealand 5. Just a handful of English words end with the letters-mt. Can you name one? 6. Whose famous last words began: “I am bored with it all”? ❑ W.C. Fields❑ Andy Warhol❑ Nostradamus❑ Winston Churchill 7. What is the title of the last album released by…