New Zealand Listener Issue 26, 2022

The idea that the fledgling Māori Health Authority is part of some slip-slidey plan to create parallel health systems – one for Māori and one for others – is farcical. I find it hard to understand the advice that might lead opposition leader Christopher Luxon to promise to ditch the new agency should National win the next election. Luxon likes to point to National’s record of Treaty of Waitangi claim settlements to support his credentials to comment on Māori development issues. He has committed to memory a tranche of Māori health statistics to show he knows there is a problem. But it all falls to pieces when he speaks, as he did on Newshub’s The Hui, like this: “Yes, we have really big improvements to get, a bunch of improvement on a range…

WINNING CAPTION Trish Bishop, Hamilton FINALISTS Brendon McCullum: “Drop the skin on the popping crease as Colin comes in to bowl.” – Philip Lynch, Upper Hutt McCullum: “My mates back home will crack up when they see me trying to sing ‘God Save the Queen’.” – Bill Grant, Napier McCullum: “And New Zealand Cricket’s offer wouldn’t cover the cost of two bananas!” – Dave Anderson, Invercargill McCullum: “The English dressing room is that way, right?” – John Edgar, Christchurch McCullum: “It’s a long way for a whitebait fritter.” – Ann Love, Nelson McCullum: “Banana balls are sitters for getting slip catches!” – Alan Belcher, Christchurch Caption Competition {listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz} TO ENTER Send your captions for the photo at right to listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz, with “Caption Competition No 466” in the subject line. Alternatively, entries can be posted to “Caption Competition No 466”, NZ Listener,…

Of course it is very laudable to encourage people to reduce or eliminate car journeys through providing incentives and infrastructure for cycling and e-cycling (“On your bike”, June 18). However, in our biggest city, cycling, whether power-assisted or not, will never be a viable solution for the majority of commuters. Most Aucklanders live in suburbs that are at least 15-20km from the CBD. Some are much further away. Many cannot live closer because of the expense and difficulty finding family-size homes. Many do not have good enough health to cycle that far. Many prefer to stay dry and comfortable on their commute, and arrive at work ready to go instead of needing to shower, and so on. The answer is not the car, nor e-bikes: it is fast, efficient public transport –…

“Life appears to me too short to be spent in nursing animosity or registering wrongs.”– Charlotte Brontë“A mass shooting happened and then politicians did something … I didn’t even know it was possible. It’s like I showed up to McDonald’s and the McFlurry machine is working.”– Trevor Noah on New York Governor Kathy Hochul signing into law gun control reforms“When humour works, it works because it’s clarifying what people already feel. It has to come from someplace real.”– Tina Fey“Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.”– Red Skelton“Nobody has ever been more surprised than a husband hearing about his wife’s plans for the second time.”– Seen on Twitter“Music is something that surpasses trends, fashion: music is something much deeper.”– Kate Bush“Science and technology revolutionise…

1. Which brand’s old TV ads suggested that consumers should “soldier on” instead of taking a sick day? ❑ Lemsip❑ Benadryl❑ Strepsils❑ Codral 2. Which city is next to Caroline Bay beach, a popular recreation area? ❑ Timaru❑ Nelson❑ Wellington❑ Napier 3. Who was the Chief of State for Vichy France during its existence? ❑ Francisco Franco❑ Philippe Pétain❑ Charles de Gaulle❑ Georges Pompidou 4. Which song was performed by ABBA to win the 1974 Eurovision Song Content? ❑ SOS❑ Dancing Queen❑ Waterloo❑ Mamma Mia 5. What is the only country in the African region where Hinduism is the most practised religion? ❑ Morocco❑ Ghana❑ Kenya❑ Mauritius 6. Which of these is a name for a small, lockable stand containing several spirit decanters? ❑ Tantalus❑ Obelus❑ Tumulus❑ Oculus 7. Which Oscar-winning actor took a hiatus for several years to work as an…

It was the pugilist in a double-breasted suit, the former Labor prime minister Paul Keating, who told Australians that when the government changes, so does their country, Keating’s words, delivered towards the end of his tenure in 1996, were less a prophecy than a lament; he could see his slayer, the centre-right soon-to-be prime minister John Howard, coming. Howard would deliver “just a straight appalling loss for Australia”, Keating warned. He was mostly wrong. Under Howard’s more than 10 years in office, the average wage increased by more than 50% and unemployment plummeted to 30-year lows. Serious gun-control laws ended mass shootings. A now widely accepted consumption tax arrived. But the nation also joined America’s endless wars, brutalised asylum seekers and stalled reconciliation with its Aboriginal people. Again, we feel the quivers of…