New Zealand Listener Issue 36, 2022

Nelson is renowned for its benign climate and pleasing environment. In general, it misses the worst of everything. We residents tend to be a bit smug about that. A gentle memory prod, however, might recollect significant flood disruption in 2011, and drought and major fires in 2019. We forget so easily. Our council did declare a “climate emergency” in May 2019, which produced endless words but no meaningful action. The government has followed suit, and there are hotly contested plans for everything. Astonishingly, to me at least, parts of our agriculture sector seem to lead the opposition to action. Agriculture has appeared on Earth over the past 10,000 years or so, known as the Holocene. A settled climate has allowed agriculture to flourish, resulting in a population explosion for humanity. But agriculture is utterly…

WINNING CAPTION Ann Love, Nelson FINALISTS Christopher Luxon: “I’ll Huffindell Puffindell blow the House down!” – Alan Belcher, Christchurch Caption: “All the king’s forces and all the king’s men couldn’t get Humpty elected again!” – Alan Belcher, Christchurch Luxon caricature: “Didn’t you know pride comes before a fall?” – Marie Curran, Dunedin Luxon: “Today Wellington, tomorrow Madame Tussauds!” – John Edgar, Christchurch Luxon: “Now you’re just egging me on.” – Vic Evans, Nelson Caption Competition {listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz} TO ENTER Send your captions for the photo at right to listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz, with “Caption Competition No 476” in the subject line. Alternatively, entries can be posted to “Caption Competition No 476”, NZ Listener, PO Box 52122, Kingsland, Auckland 1352. Entries must be received by noon, Tuesday, Sept 6. THE PRIZE Journalist Hazel Phillips’ story of three years living in mountain huts and tramping alone for days…

Sadly, Chris Finlayson (“Key witness”, August 20) seems not to understand the spirit and intent of the Form 7 history curriculum he studied any better than Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern did when she pronounced on the same subject. Both studied Section B, “England 1558-1689”, which deals with the evolution of monarchy from medieval and personal to a recognisably modern constitutionalism. This occurred by way of a successful opposition to the Crown’s religious absolutism that sparked a similarly successful opposition in the political sphere. One would think that anyone interested in politics would recognise this, in later life if not during the study, but apparently the point has eluded both Finlayson and Ardern. It should also be made clear the curriculum always, in fact, offered a Section B alternative to this topic in: “New…

“Three stages of career development are: I want to be in the meeting, I want to run the meeting, I want to avoid the meetings.”– Seen on Twitter“The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.”– Jane Wagner“The strangeness will wear off and I think we will discover the deeper meanings in modern art.”– Jackson Pollock“Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.”– William Hazlitt“To treat your facts with imagination is one thing, to imagine your facts is another.”– John Burroughs“We all survive more than we think we can.”– Joan Didion“Writing is hard work and bad for the health.”– EB White“Tell all the truth but tell it slant.”– Emily Dickinson“The problem with carbon offsets is everyone wants to believe in them. Buyers want a cheap way to…

1. Often featured in the comic book series Asterix, what kind of thing is a menhir? ❑ Magic potion❑ Blacksmith’s tool❑ Stone monolith❑ Musical instrument 2. Which of these is the title of an acclaimed 1977 play by New Zealander Roger Hall? ❑ Life with Father❑ Middle Age Spread❑ Cloud 9❑ What the Butler Saw 3. Who is New Zealand’s leading wicket-taker in test cricket? ❑ Richard Hadlee❑ Tim Southee❑ Daniel Vettori❑ Trent Boult 4. Which country includes the large islands of New Ireland and New Britain? ❑ Samoa❑ United States❑ Canada❑ Papua New Guinea 5. What does a pullet become when she reaches one year of age? ❑ Sow❑ Hen❑ Ewe❑ Cow 6. Which of these artworks includes a depiction of Halley’s Comet? ❑ The Last Supper❑ Girl with a Pearl Earring❑ Bayeux Tapestry❑ The Scream 7. What colour was the…

It had been a lovely summer holiday in Italy, but now the slightly too-tanned, pasta-fed passengers in the back of the taxi were brought back down to earth. “I’ve had enough of this,” their cab driver scowled at them in the mirror, as he navigated the motorway from Berlin’s airport. “Enough! First, all these stupid rules about vaccinations. And now we have to pay so much more for everything. A nice life is impossible here. Something’s got to change.” A taxi ride in the big city often comes with a controversial opinion. But somehow this burly fellow’s revolutionary vitriol was sharpened by the fact that he was also, as he declared later while easily tossing our luggage around, a mixed martial arts fighter. Before the leaves even turn brown, this furious, fist-fighting cabbie…