New Zealand Listener Issue 43, 2022

Close to my Otago Peninsula home there’s a creek called Smith’s running into Otago Harbour, and I walk to it most mornings. By the bridge one crisp autumn day, I was astonished to see a scattering of strange fish lying flat and stranded in the rocky intertidal zone, a dozen of them, unearthly silver with forked tails and big eyes suggesting they inhabit the ocean’s dim-lit depths. Turns out they were a school of youngish Ray’s bream, a species more usually found offshore in northern waters up to 1000m deep. Since then, during winter, there have been more strandings of these fish at several Otago beaches and inlets, including hundreds of them washed up near Waitati. Bream do migrate, and maybe large numbers were enticed south by ocean warming or changes…

WINNING CAPTION Joe Baker, Dunedin FINALISTS Elton John: “Yep, an equilateral triangle, Joe. Not bad.” – Mike Lynch, Upper Hutt Elton: “Hmm. Thanks, but why is it hung on a mankini?” – David Field, Rotorua President Biden: “No, Elton. It’s usually worn around the neck.” – Stuart Weekes, Waiheke Island Biden: “I want you to have this. I found it in a White House office drawer and the colour just doesn’t go with anything I wear.” – Bob Richardson, Christchurch Caption: Elton John unable to see the positives, despite wearing rose-tinted spectacles. – Marie Curran, Dunedin Biden: “Which of us is supposed to wear this?” – Ann Love, Nelson Biden: “I know you’d rather get it from a Queen, but I’m the next best thing.” – Mike Hamblyn, Dunedin Caption Competition {listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz} TO ENTER Send your captions for the photo at right…

I grew up in a farming environment where many people ate lots of meat (“Meat the challenge”, October 8). But my parents were not farmers and my father grew an abundance of vegetables. We ate a lot of fruit. We were healthy, fit and active. As I grew older, travelled, and learnt from other people around the world, I moved to a more grain, nuts, seeds, vegetable and fruit diet, low in salt, sugar and fat. I am not a vegan but as I get older still, I move more that way. I do this for health and fitness reasons, but also, for a long time now, climate change reasons. Your cover story’s main premise is that we should eat fewer animal products if we are serious about climate change. But something like…

“I can create a new unique password or I can remember my password, but I cannot do both.”– Seen on Twitter“People come to music to seek oblivion: is that not also a form of deception?”– Claude Debussy“Think about it: Joe Biden could smoke a lot of weed. He’s always puttering around like he forgot where he’s going, he’s wearing sunglasses everywhere he goes. I mean, he definitely talks like he’s high.”– Trevor Noah on Biden’s decision to pardon federal marijuana offences“Write to be understood, speak to be heard, read to grow.”– Lawrence Clark Powell“There is no greater impediment to the advancement of knowledge than the ambiguity of words.”– Thomas Reid“To give without any reward, or any notice, has a special quality of its own.”– Anne Morrow Lindbergh“You know how advice…

1. Peter Mahon, who led the Commission of Inquiry into the Erebus crash, was also involved in which famous case? ❑ Parker-Hulme murder case❑ Aramoana mass shootings❑ Pukekawa murders of Harvey and Jeanette Crewe❑ Bassett Road machine-gun murders 2. “My mother’s not herself today” comes from which film? ❑ Psycho❑ Mommie Dearest❑ Sybil❑ Carrie 3. Marcescence refers to what? ❑ Leaves that turn yellow or brown before they fall❑ Leaves that remain green all year round❑ Leaves that wither in autumn but stay attached to the tree over winter❑ Plants that die off completely in winter but return in spring 4. Which movie was Steven Spielberg filming while he supervised post-production on Jurassic Park? ❑ Hook❑ Amistad❑ Saving Private Ryan❑ Schindler’s List 5. A coleopterist studies what? ❑ Ants❑ Beetles❑ Stick insects❑ Flies 6. What year was the microwave oven…

Incredible as it may seem, there was a time when many serious-minded people were asking if David Cameron, who unintentionally removed the UK from the EU, was the worst prime minister in modern history. His replacement, Theresa May, swiftly put an end to that debate, as she almost immediately replaced him in that unwanted spot. But she was forced out by Boris Johnson, who in turn was widely thought to have set new standards for poor leadership, necessitating his replacement by Liz Truss. Now, after just a few weeks of her premiership, the nation is nostalgic for Johnson, and May and Cameron seem by comparison to be towering figures of competence. No sooner had the official mourning period for the Queen ended than Truss, via her Chancellor of the Exchequer, “Kami-Kwasi” Kwarteng,…