New Zealand Listener Issue 5, 2023

My New Year’s resolution to improve my physical wellbeing starts with taking a baseline measurement of my body’s current condition. The Body Mass Index (BMI) seems to be the accepted measure and I did consider taking a measurement of my BMI, but it is a difficult ask. I have a body like a chicken’s: legs too skinny and middle too round. The BMI of my legs is Twiggy and the BMI of my middle is Santa Claus. The main issue I have with BMI is that it isn’t relevant to me or the life I lead. I want to measure my body’s ability to endure another year of war, poverty and plague, and the measurements need to be easy to calculate and relevant to my lifestyle. With these constraints in mind, I…

WINNING CAPTION Rex McGregor, Auckland FINALISTS Volodymyr Zelenskyy: “This is how you fold a fitted sheet. No problem.” – Hermione Prentice, Hamilton Kamala and Nancy cover Volodymyr’s back. – Trish Bishop, Hamilton Zelenskyy: “And now, lot 2 of our charity auction, what bid do we have for this personally signed Ukrainian flag? Shall we start at $1 billion?” – Stephen Malanchak, Cambridge Nancy Pelosi: “Give us ladies a coupla hours, Mr President, and we’ll have you the darndest quilt to take home.” – Stuart Weekes, Waiheke Island Kamala Harris: “Oh, I haven’t had my colours done in years!” – Mike Hamblyn, Dunedin Zelenskyy: “Cold wash. Hang vertically to dry.” – Ann Love, Nelson Caption Competition {listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz} TO ENTER Send your captions for the photo at right to listenercaption@aremedia.co.nz, with “Caption Competition No 496” in the subject line. Alternatively, entries can be…

Paul Catmur (And another thing, January 14), suggests compulsory insurance to help reduce the road toll, and this may have some merit. However, two more important issues in New Zealand affecting road safety are the low standards of driver training and testing, and the quality of our roads. We require new drivers to be able to drive a car while abiding by the road rules, but little else. There is no incentive to acquire advanced skills such as safe driving at open-road speeds (including lane discipline and passing manoeuvres), braking and evasion techniques, and skid control. Shortly after my two teenage boys passed their driving tests, I enrolled them in an advanced driving course to learn and practise some of these skills – skills which have allowed them to reach middle age…