New Zealand Listener Issue 7 2018

There is no question that our small, remote nation depends on trade. But there were times during the protracted negotiations that have now culminated in the Comprehensive and Progressive Trans- Pacific Partnership (CPTPP) when the visceral debate here could easily have led bystanders to believe New Zealanders specialise primarily in trading insults. The fact that there is now a deal to be signed – after the efforts of successive prime ministers ranging from Helen Clark and John Key to Bill English and now Jacinda Ardern – is a cause for real celebration. Our role in recent decades as free-trade pioneers, in the teeth of other countries’ stubbornly defended protectionism, should be a source of national pride. Our exports reap more than $70 billion a year, but farmers and manufacturers know what…

FIND US ONLINE VISIT US ONLINE FOR EXTRA CONTENT AND DAILY UPDATES • noted.co.nz/the-listener • twitter.com/nzlistener • facebook.com/nzlistener It’s correct that the Prime Minister’s pregnancy is big news around the world (Editorial, February 3). As pointed out, Jacinda Ardern and her partner will be parents with more options than most – not the least being that the support staff available to the PM will be at least 15 times the level it was in 1987. In that year, I was married to Michelle Boag, who gave birth to our son by caesarean section and was back at her desk as the Leader of the Opposition’s press secretary and minder three days later. Obviously, the job of prime minister tops the political ladder. However, the point remains relevant: there is nothing terribly novel about a woman having a baby…

WINNING CAPTION Paul Kelly, Palmerston North FINALISTS Parker: “Embroidery, huh? I’m more a macramé man.” – Steve Cox, Christchurch Parker: “See – I did not eat all the pies!” – Peter Carey, Christchurch Parker: “Some success in the beef section at the A&P Show, I see.” – Ann Love, Nelson Parker: “Drop your glass jaw a smidgen, mate, and we are done.” – Haydn Delves, Auckland Parker: “I’ll give you a belt!” – Barbara Harwood, Auckland Parker: “I’m stronger than the walls of Jericho.” – Philip Lynch, Upper Hutt Caption Competition {caption@listener.co.nz} TO ENTER Send your captions for the photo above to caption@listener.co.nz, with “Caption Competition No 267” in the subject line. Alternatively, entries can be posted to “Caption Competition No 267”, NZ Listener, Private Bag 92512, Wellesley St, Auckland 1141, or submitted through listener.co.nz/win. Entries must be received by…

“I have this theory that cycling is as close as a middle-class straight white guy can get to understanding Being Female. People have a reckless disregard for your safety, you have to treat everyone like they might hurt you, and if you do get hurt people will blame you for existing.” – Christchurch’s Emma Hart on Twitter “A man broke a Guinness world record by walking barefoot on a 120-foot path of loose Legos. This beats the old record set by every dad getting up to use the bathroom at night.” – US comedian Jimmy Fallon “We are continually faced with great opportunities brilliantly disguised as unsolvable problems.” – Margaret Mead “I put my heart and my soul into my work and have lost my mind in the process.” – Vincent van Gogh “Who…

Celebrity chef on menu at seafood festival Rotorua Daily Post, 22/1/18 I have been dining at this venue ever since it originally opened as a brassiere several years ago. Bream Bay News, 19/10/17 “There are some areas where there’s very little crime and then others where police cars are the most common car driving down the street, but the population doesn’t have anything to do with that.” Bay of Plenty Times, 15/5/17 … a whopping 94% of Hawke’s Bay people saying they would give up buying single-use plastic bottles if it was socially unacceptable to do so. BayBuzz, Nov/Dec 2017 There was a time you’d think twice in this neighbourhood asking anyone for carrot jerky but I took my chances. Viva, 9/8/17 An 11th hour bid to save Wellington’s trolley buses is set to come down to the wire. Dominion Post,…

1. Which of these words has a similar meaning to “nugatory”? ❑ Nauseating ❑ Mysterious ❑ Satisfying ❑ Unimportant 2. Which of these languages has the most native speakers? ❑ Russian ❑ Portuguese ❑ Japanese ❑ German 3. Who was the only inmate at Spandau Prison for 20 years? ❑ Walter Raleigh ❑ Rudolf Hess ❑ Alfred Dreyfus ❑ Napoleon Bonaparte 4. What is the official name of China’s currency? ❑ Renminbi ❑ Yuan 5. In Norse mythology, which deity is depicted as having lost an eye? ❑ Odin ❑ Loki ❑ Thor ❑ Freyja 6. Which 1895 novel by George du Maurier originated the word “svengali”? ❑ The House of Mirth ❑ Lorna Doone ❑ The Scarlet Letter ❑ Trilby 7. Which of these people did not star in the BBC’s much-loved radio comedy The Goon Show? ❑ John Cleese ❑ Peter Sellers ❑ Spike Milligan ❑ Harry Secombe 8. Moore’s law is a well-known observation concerning which field? ❑ Psychology ❑ Electronics ❑ Climatology ❑…