Table of contents for Dec/Jan 2022 in Guideposts

As I write this, a number of weeks before you read it, the days are getting noticeably shorter, darkness coming on earlier, especially out here in the Berkshires, where the old hills swallow the light even before the sun sets. Interesting then that one of our editors reading through the proofs of this issue said, “Hey, this is the issue of light!” The nature of light has always befuddled me. How can it be both particle and wave? I’ve been trying to grasp that fundamental duality since I took Physics for Poets at the University of Michigan to satisfy the science requirement. It reminds me of that loopy novelty song from the 1950s you might remember: “Istanbul was Constantinople. Now it’s Istanbul, not Constantinople….” This confusion is not new to…

WHO SHE IS Jen Owens is the founder of Forai, a faith-based St. Louis, Missouri, nonprofit with a unique way of helping refugee and immigrant women find their footing. In 2008, Jen and her family hosted two Bhutanese families for Thanksgiving. Members of an ethnic minority, they had fled persecution in Bhutan and spent 16 years in refugee camps in Nepal. Finally granted asylum in the United States, they’d arrived in St. Louis just two weeks earlier. Jen’s church worked with a local resettlement group. The group asked if anyone could host the new arrivals for their first Thanksgiving. Jen and her family volunteered. One of the Bhutanese families—a couple and their daughter—spoke English at the dinner. But the other, a widow and her two young children, did not. After the…

I’m not a fan of winter. There are things I appreciate: the holidays, cozying up with a mug of hot tea, the beauty of a blanket of snow covering the ground. Still, I get sad when the days get shorter and the darkness of the season sets in. We will experience more than one spiritual winter in our lives, when we feel we are stumbling around in the dark, alone, disconnected from God. It’s inevitable. Maybe you’ve lost a job or a loved one. Maybe a blizzard of bad feelings has enveloped you. This is a painful spot to be in. But remember the childhood game of Hot and Cold, in which someone hides an item and you have to find it? When you got really close, the other person…

Gloria Vanderbilt jeans. The year I was 16, that’s all I wanted for Christmas. I dreamed of a gorgeously wrapped box waiting for me under the tree with the only present that mattered. Why? Well, I guess I was acting like a typical teenager, a little caught up in fashion and image. I imagined all the heads that would turn as I walked down the halls of my Broken Arrow, Oklahoma, high school in my sleek new Vanderbilts. I wasn’t a mean girl or anything. In fact, I was a pretty good kid. But something about those jeans got ahold of my imagination and wouldn’t let go. I had to have them! Broken Arrow was a relatively small town back then, not far from Tulsa, the big city as far…

Kristen Kemp isn’t the only caregiver to struggle with denial about the extent of a loved one’s cognitive deficits. “For some people, denial is part of the grief process,” says Home Instead gerontologist and caregiver advocate Lakelyn Hogan, Ph.D. “Subconsciously, they know they are going to see their loved one decline—it’s called anticipatory grief—and denial helps buffer their feelings.” Once family members have accepted their caregiver role, another type of denial may set in. “They think they can do it all alone,” Hogan says. “They cut themselves off from vital resources that could be helpful to them in their caregiving journey.” Here’s how to move forward: Accept the personal losses. Sometimes caregivers deny the reality of the situation because they fear losing their own freedom and having to drastically adjust…

“That doesn’t look anything like our Christmas tree at home,” said Austin, one of our 10-year-old twins. “I know,” I said, adjusting the green garland I’d taped to the wall in our small rented apartment in Nairobi, Kenya. Weeks earlier, we had traveled there from our home in Orlando, Florida, on a mission trip to work at a conference. I stood back and checked the garland. Did it look more like the outline of a Christmas tree now? Anderson, the other twin, pointed to the yellow construction paper star on top. “The star’s crooked.” “Why couldn’t we go home for Christmas, Mom?” 14-year-old Garrett asked. “I miss doing all the fun holiday stuff with my friends.” “We couldn’t get a flight back for all six of us in time,” my…

HEALING OUR “Promiseme you won’t bring up politics,” I said to my husband, Don, as we left for Christmas dinner at my sister’s. “I’ve already promised!” Don said. For most of our marriage, Don and I had been on the same page politically. But lately we weren’t even in the same book, and Don never missed a chance to voice his opinions. I knew it wasn’t just Don and me with this problem. The whole country seemed spoiling for a fight. Don kept his word, and dinner went well—until my sister made a comment about the news. Her husband chimed in. Don responded. In seconds, harsh words were flying. “Isn’t it nice that we can vote for anyone we want?” I said nervously when there was a break in the…

CARDS FOR TROOPS In the June/July 2020 issue, I wrote a Someone Cares about my nonprofit, Making Cards for Our Troops. Our all-volunteer group makes and ships unsigned Christmas and all-occasion cards to deployed troops so they have cards to send to loved ones. I asked GUIDEPOSTS readers to join in. Thanks to you, Making Cards for Our Troops took in 76,012 cards last year—a 1,000 percent increase! Readers nationwide continue to make cards for us. We also get notes from military members who are so grateful to have cards for family. What an exciting journey! Thank you, GUIDE-POSTS, for being such a pivotal part of our growth. E-mail us at cardsfortroops2398@gmail.com to learn how you too can pitch in. PAT BRODSKY Annapolis, Maryland COMFORT IN LOSS I’ve enjoyed reading…

* Get Boost your spiritual wellbeing! Visit guideposts.org for web-exclusive stories, life advice, prayer tips, recipes and more.  * Watch Kristin Chenoweth (page 36) shares what she loves about GUIDEPOSTS and takes us back to her first audition for a Christmas singing role at church at guideposts.org/kristinchenoweth.  * Learn Want to start exercising? Noa Shaw (page 42) is here to help—and inspire! He offers tips for beginners and discusses the spiritual benefits of exercise. Watch our video at guideposts.org/noashaw.  * Explore Take a tour of Leavenworth, Washington, aka the Village of Lights (page 20). Hear from local business owners and the director of the Leavenworth Nutcracker Museum—one of the largest of its kind in the world! Check out our exclusive video at guideposts.org/leavenworth.  * Connect Join the growing Guideposts online…

PASS IT ON WARM WISHES GO AROUND It was the last day of school before Christmas break. One of my second-grade students came up to my desk and asked me to help her read the card I’d given her. “I love how everybody’s card has a different picture on the front,” she told me. “It makes all of the cards feel special.” Rather than give my students identical cards out of a brand-new box, I saved up the Christmas cards I’d been given. I cut off the colorful front of each card and wrote personalized messages on the back, turning the cards into unique holiday postcards. Several students told me this was the first Christmas card they’d ever gotten that was addressed to them specifically. I’ve done the same thing…

Truth to tell, I’ve never made a New Year’s resolution—a good thing too, because I suspect I’d never make it through the first month. What I do believe in is giving myself a new start. Something you can do again and again, as you seek new goals and grow in faith. Like this. Opening their treasure chests, they offered him gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they left for their own country by another road. (Matthew 2:11–12) Not for nothing do we call the visit of the Magi to the Christ Child by a special name: the Epiphany. It was a profound revelation for them, a new start. Afterward they returned to their country by a new route. I…

The past few years have been filled with change for my wife and me. The sale of our longtime home. A move across the country. Settling into a new home in a new climate and community, along with new jobs and, of course, some pandemic-related adjustments. Times like these are challenging, but they also present an opportunity for new beginnings, as do Advent, Christmas and the New Year. If we’re alert and intentional, those transitions can open the door for us to start something new or resume something that has lapsed, such as a daily prayer habit. Here are six steps that can help anyone, in any season, start every day with prayer. Step 1 As soon as possible after waking (it’s okay to pour a cup of coffee first),…

Real-life heroes My mom and my friend Lisa: They fostered creativity in their children in all the ways I hope to! Go-to place to pray Bed, before falling asleep. Before the babies, the church altar late at night. A surprising detail about you I’m an extreme introvert. Favorite Bible verse Matthew 6:25–26. I am a worrier, and it gives me peace if I can really focus on those verses during stressful times. What you do for your spiritual well-being I write down the good things that happen every day. For more on this story, see FAMILY ROOM Q&A by Celeste McCauley. Find a longer version at guideposts.org/erinnapier…

Meet and I bet you don’t think, That guy’s a New York fitness instructor. I’m not some toned and tanned yoga teacher wearing trendy athletic gear. I’m a 58-year-old recovering alcoholic and drug addict with a regularguy physique, shaved head, long gray beard and a body covered in tattoos. Actually, I don’t think of myself as a fitness instructor, though I do teach SoulCycle classes in New York City, where I live. I’m not sure what to call what I do for a living. How about…soul inspirer. That’s my goal for every class I lead. It’s also what I try to do for my life-coaching clients. And my podcast listeners. I have been blessed by God with an amazing second chance in life. I went from being an addict, drug…

“Gratitude is the grace that makes the blessings flow.”LEVAR BURTON, actor and television host “Give! Consideration, patience, love. Making the world a better place begins with you!”actor DENNIS HAYSBERT “The man who built that manger had one purpose in mind… God has another. You’ll never know how far-reaching God’s plan is for your work.”MARK HART, author, speaker, cohost of The Catholic Guy Show on SiriusXM “Regrets are a waste of time… when there’s so much beauty and love and humor in this world.”RITA MORENO, EGOT-winning actor “No emptiness ever stays empty. Empty places always fill.”ANN VOSKAMP, author “May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas Eve.”as seen on Pinterest “The birth of Jesus made possible not just a new way of understanding life but a…

Thank you, Lord, for blessing my brother and his wife with the gift of pregnancy. They had been going through fertility treatments for years. —ARLINDA Praise God for an Al-Anon Zoom meeting yesterday! —MARI Thank you, God, for healing my turbulent relationship with my boss. It is much more peaceful. —JULIET God heard your prayers, and the storm passed over us. I was safe and protected walking back and forth to work. I’m so grateful! —M. Thank you for helping my daughter be more confident. —ALEX From our website visitors. Share your answered prayer at guideposts.org/answeredprayers…

My husband, Russ, and I drove through our neighborhood, the place we’d called home for 28 years. The Sierra Nevada foothills, once thick with towering pines, were unrecognizable. The ground was covered with a heavy layer of ash. The trees that remained were charred stumps. Two weeks earlier, we’d gotten an early-morning call telling us to evacuate immediately. The wildfire tearing through Northern California had spread and was headed our way. We’d jumped in the car with our cats and a few belongings. For days, we’d bounced from hotel to hotel, desperate for news. What finally came wasn’t good. Our house had been right in the fire’s path. Now we’d been given permission to return. Russ and I brought shovels, work boots, N95 masks and gloves. We’d salvage anything we…

In my mother’s room at the memory care center, I dug through the clothes piled on the floor looking for a sweater and scarf. Her closet had plenty of hangers, but Mom, who’d always been tidy, no longer remembered to use them. “What’s happening, dear?” she asked, fuzzy on my name. “It’s Christmas Eve,” I reminded her. “We’re going to church. One of your favorite places.” “We always go to such fun places,” Mom said, smiling vacantly. It was unclear what, if anything, she had understood. I glanced at my watch. “We need to hurry.” My dad, husband and three kids were meeting us at church for the afternoon service. Even though I wanted to get Mom settled in a pew early, everything, even the simplest tasks, took longer now.…