Table of contents for Jun-01-15 in Us Weekly

Maron airs on IFC Thursdays at 10 P.M. 1. I wear patchouli. 2. I had an appendectomy. 3. I dance in my living room. 4. I have a scar along the left side of my nose that is very hard to see. 5. I high-fived Axl Rose at the Pink Dot grocery store on Sunset Boulevard. 6. I get obsessively committed to certain jeans, boots and people. 7. I’ve baked bread. 8. I was sent home from a class trip in eighth grade because I got caught with boobs in my hands. I didn’t get to see Carlsbad Caverns until much later. 9. I stole my roommate’s Jefferson Starship Red Octopus cassette at tennis camp and never copped to it. Sorry, Stu. It was me. 10. I’ve had sex in…

They Make Crafts! “It’s the best thing in the world,” Scott Foley (with Malina, 5, at a Barbie-themed party in L.A. May 9) tells Us of being a dad. Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka’s twins, Harper and Gideon, 4, could weather anything April 3. They Play in the Rain! They Get Painted! Kim Kardashian captioned her May 17 shot of North, 23 months: “Minnie Mouse.” They Feed Dogs! “Carmen is a good sharer,” Hilaria Baldwin wrote of her 21-monthold April 23.…

Hulk bulk! Zac Efron was the leader of the (eight) pack in Georgia April 30. Rita Ora (in L.A.) said last year’s Superman stripping was a “spontaneous moment.” He gave a Wolverinestyle thank you at 2014’s MTV Movie Awards in L.A. “I do a lot of CrossFit-type stuff,” the 27-year-old (mimicking Spider-Man in Georgia April 28) has said. Riding pretty! The California native channeled the Phantom in Italy last summer.…

Noah Galloway was a bundle of nerves proposing to Jamie Boyd on Dancing With the Stars May 11. “I was so worried,” says the double amputee, 33, whose Viennese waltz nabbed him a spot in the finals. Beforehand, he had considered every detail, including the Army Reserve specialist’s outfit. “He said, ‘Go get a dress — the judges may want you to recap how proud you are of me,’” Boyd, 29, tells Us of the trickery. Galloway intended to rise to Boyd’s high standards: “I realized early if I didn’t step up my game, she’d walk away.” LEARN EVEN MORE ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE STAR SWEETIES AT USMAGAZINE.COM…

Kate minus one? Jon Gosselin has filed for full custody of daughter Hannah, 11. “Unfortunately, this seems to be the only option that will yield results at this point,” his attorney Kristen Doleva-Lecher confirms to Hot Stuff. If granted, Gosselin’s ex-wife, Kate, 40, would remain the primary caregiver for the rest of the pair’s sextuplets, Alexis, Aaden, Collin, Leah and Joel, plus twins Cara and Mady, 14, at her 6,000-square-foot Wernersville, Pennsylvania, home. While the touring DJ, 38, refuses to elaborate on the filing, he has accused reality star Kate of emotional and physical abuse in the past, requesting primary temporary custody of all eight children in 2010. Adds a source, “Jon feels he has his kids’ best interests at heart.…

After proudly declaring “I am a woman” in an April 24 interview with ABC’s Diane Sawyer, Bruce Jenner is relieved to be living openly for the first time in 65 years. “Bruce is doing great,” exwife Kris Jenner, 59, told Us May 12. “Everybody’s supersupportive.” But the family initially struggled to accept the Olympic gold medalist’s new identity, as evident on E!’s May 17 and 18 Keeping Up With the Kardashians special, About Bruce (taped in January). Us examines his biggest revelations. He wants to fully transition Bruce told Sawyer he’d consider sexual reassignment surgery “down the line.” But on About Bruce, he made it seem imminent. When stepdaughter Kim Kardashian, 34, asked if he would “fully become a woman,” the dad of six answered he’d “probably” have an operation…

Charlize Theron and Sean Penn were hot commodities in Cannes. In town to promote her sci-fi flick Mad Max: Fury Road, the actress and her leading man received no less than three invites to party on luxury yachts. But, says a source close to the pair, “they declined them all to stay back at their hotel.” The five-star Hôtel du Cap Eden Roc offered a sight more priceless than the French Riviera: Theron’s 3-year-old son, Jackson, splashing in the heated infinity pool. “At one point, Sean swung him around,” a hotel guest says of a May 13 outing. “It was clear how much Sean loves him.” And his new G-rated existence. Since embarking on a romance with his longtime friend, 39, in January 2014 — and secretly proposing less than…

ACTRESS, 42 “I try to eat healthy during the week, but if there’s somebody’s birthday and they bring out a cake, I’ll have the cake. I try to do everything in moderation because I don’t believe you can wake up at 4 in the morning to work out and eat nothing. Terrible.” JOE MANGANIELLO ACTOR & AUTHOR, 38 “Do I regret having to give up eating certain things? Do I regret giving up alcohol? No way in hell! You have to stop trying to see what you can get away with and see what you can be.” IDRIS ELBA ACTOR, 42 “You watch yourself age and it’s hard to feel like a sex symbol. Apparently those days are for when you are a young man. . . . But it’s…

It took four seasons of Edie Falco playing an ER nurse struggling with addiction before fans saw her as anyone other than Tony Soprano’s wife. “People stopped screaming ‘Carmela!’ on the street and started screaming ‘Jackie!’” the 51-year-old single mother of son Anderson, 10, and daughter Macy, 7, jokes to Us. Now, with Showtime’s Nurse Jackie (Sundays, 9 p.m.) ending its seven-year run June 28, the former Sopranos star is preparing to bid adieu to another TV series. Explains the Brooklyn native: “For an actor, it’s as close as you can get to having a real job!” She takes Us through her withdrawal. Q: Are you satisfied with the finale? I am very, very pleased. It’s sort of exquisite. We have great writers who are true to . . .…

RITA ORA DEPP > Now that’s a cocktail dress. ELLIE GOULDING HENRY > Hey, I think I can make out the Big Dipper! PARIS HILTON WEBER > Concealing everything we saw on the sex tape. BRANDI GLANVILLE DEPP > I see London. I see France. And China. And India. JOANNA KRUPA FLORES > Dancing With the Poles. KYLIE JENNER LAWRENCE > This gives me cape fear. JAIMIE ALEXANDER HARRIS > What a puzzling mess.…

JESSICA CHASTAIN 24% CHARLIZE THERON 20% JULIANNE MOORE 4% KARLIE KLOSS 4% DAKOTA JOHNSON 8% ASHLEY GREENE 4% LILY JAMES 20% ALEXANDER MCQUEEN The Legend leather tote, $2,195, alexander mcqueen.com SIENNA MILLER 16% By Sasha Charnin Morrison / With reporting by Jamie Blynn KATE HUDSON 50% ROLAND MOURET JESSICA SIMPSON 50% GARCELLE BEAUVAIS 65% MICHAEL COSTELLO COUTURE ASHANTI 35% CASSIE VENTURA 24% RUMER WILLIS 76% HOUSE OF CB KELLY KILLOREN BENSIMON 54% CHARLIE BY MATTHEW ZINK RIHANNA 46% LEANN RIMES 56% CHRISSY TEIGEN 44% MIKOH PIPPA MIDDLETON 65% VIX PAULA HERMANNY MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ 35% By Sasha Charnin Morrison / With reporting by Jamie Blynn…

Nicole Kidman transformed into Grace Kelly (inset, in 1961) for Grace of Monaco (Lifetime, May 25 at 9 P.M.). The Aussie has called the princess “divine.” Before shooting Nina, which debuted at 2014’s Cannes film festival, Zoe Saldana took voice lessons to portray jazz singer Nina Simone (inset, in 1965). “She wore me out!” Queen Latifah tells Us of playing trailblazing 1920s blues singer Bessie Smith in the HBO film Bessie. “She lived a heck of a life.” Starring in The Secret Life of Marilyn Monroe (Lifetime, May 30 and 31 at 8 P.M.) was a natural fit for Kelli Garner. “I’m voluptuous!” she admits to Us.…

Robert Pattinson sprang for a Citi Bike in NYC’s SoHo May 14. They Rent Bikes! They Mug for Selfies! “You just took a picture of the audience,” George Clooney (left, in NYC May 14) joked to David Letterman. “My kids worked really hard. They squeezed 160 lemons,” Julie Bowen (in L.A. May 7) said of raising money for Nepal earthquake victims. They Sell Lemonade! They Toss the Ball! Rumer Willis (wearing Canyon River Blues from Sears) played with a pal’s dog in Beverly Hills April 28.…

Viva forever! After a six-month engagement, Geri Halliwell, 42, and Formula One racing boss Christian Horner, 41, tied the knot May 15 at St. Mary’s Church in Bedfordshire, England. Arriving a fashionable 25 minutes late with daughter Bluebell, 9, the former Spice Girl was led down the aisle by Baby Spice Emma Bunton’s sons. When the newlyweds exited the soft-lit countryside venue more than an hour later, they were met with “a huge round of applause,” says an eyewitness. (Ex- bandmates Melanie Brown and Victoria Beckham, who sent well-wishes via social media, and Melanie Chisholm were unable to attend.) The pair delighted the crowd with a kiss before hopping into a reception-bound vintage Rolls-Royce. Adds the partygoer: “They had a wonderful day surrounded by caring friends.”…

Altar Bound Josh Brolin, 47, and his former assistant Kathryn Boyd got engaged in April, a source confirms. The couple have been dating for two years. On Her Own Modern Family’s Ariel Winter, 17, announced May 15 she was officially emancipated. She had been removed from her mother’s home back in 2012 amid allegations of physical and emotional abuse. Wedding Bells Glee alum Heather Morris, 28, said “I do” to high school sweetheart Taylor Hubbell at California’s Old Canyon Ranch May 16. The pair have son Elijah, 20 months. The Doctor Is In Hulu has picked up The Mindy Project for a fourth season after the comedy, created by Mindy Kaling, 35, was canceled by Fox. Packing Up Shop NYC’s iconic FAO Schwarz toy store will close its Fifth Avenue do ors…

Cuba Gooding Jr. is the accused in FX’s American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson. Selma Blair (on set in L.A. May 14) tells Us she’s “excited” to portray victim Nicole’s pal Kris. Meeting Kris helped David Schwimmer get into the role of her late ex, attorney Robert Kardashian. In 1995, Denise Brown (Jordana Brewster) testified in the trial for sister Nicole’s murder. The drama will focus on the ex–NFL pro’s legal team, including Robert Shapiro (John Travolta).…

“I can’t afford to have my reputation tarnished,” says Liukin (with Hough, left, and Farber May 4). “That’s not something that I ’m going to talk about,” she said on-air of feelings. Next up: opening the Shine Agency to represent athletes. I’d been asked to do Dancing With the Stars before and said no — reality TV just wasn’t my thing. But when I was offered the opportunity to dance with Derek Hough and keep my class schedule at NYU, I went for it. In gymnastics, I was criticized for being cold. This seemed like a great chance to share my personality. Being on the show was different than I’d envisioned, though. Let me be clear: The results have nothing to do with it. I’m used to competition and not…

Lance Bass, the host of Dirty Pop on SiriusXM, tells Us he’s in sync with these hits UPTOWN FUNK / MARK RONSON “As a Mississippi native, I smile when Bruno Mars name-checks Jackson.” LIGHTHOUSE / G.R.L. “So emotional! Their first cut since [singer] Simone Battle passed away.” TATTOOED HEART / ARIANA GRANDE “This song made me first take note of one of the best singers around.” FOREVER FOR NOW / LP “It’s haunting and completely perfect. LP is the real deal. Trust me.” SOMEBODY LOVES YOU / BETTY WHO “People are just starting to cele brate this Aussie — so get on board!”…

The gloves are off! During an NYC onstage talk with Today’s Hoda Kotb May 13, Melissa Rivers declared that former Fashion Police host Kathy Griffin “s--t all over my mother’s legacy.” (Griffin — who stepped in after Joan Rivers’ death — quit the E! series abruptly in March, implying it did not “permit intelligent humor.”) And while Melissa, 47, claimed Griffin had dismissed the show’s humor as “old-fashioned,” a source close to the comedian, 54, says she would never tarnish Joan’s reputation. “Kathy considered Joan a mentor,” the insider says. “The truth is, the show was never going to be the same without Joan.” SEW BACK TOGETHER On the matter of Dreadlockgate, when Giuliana Rancic’s controversial on-air comments precipitated Kelly Osbourne’s exit, Melissa also pulled no punches. “Just like a…

You have no idea what kind of pig you’re talking to!” warns the star, who plays red priestess Melisandre on Game of Thrones (HBO, Sundays, 10 p.m.). “I throw everything in my bag. There are loads of receipts, mostly from sushi restaurants; Fiji dollars; tiny marshmallows; a toothpick and tampons.” What else does the Dutch actress, dating actor Kees van Nieuwkerk, 27, toss in her Elliot Mann tote? DARE TO DIAL “I have an iPhone 5 with an idiotproof cover on it. I’m on Instagram and Twitter. But the more we are texting in this world, the more I like to call. It’s just easier.” PEEPER KEEPER “There’s a box for my contacts, although I wear daily lenses. So I don’t really need that anymore. But hey, of course I…

“Bouncing back feels impossible, but I know it is important as a woman, and now a mommy, to not give up.” On getting into shape after delivering twins in November, ZOE SALDANA “I’m a che-gan. It’s a cheating vegan.” JARED LETO “I do this thing with a sledgehammer where I swing it and hit a rubber block, and it gets out all my aggressions. Everyone is like, ‘Uh-oh, Hilary’s got the hammer — get out of the way!’” On her signature exercise move, HILARY DUFF “It’s very hard work. I don’t know if you’re aware of the contraptions under here. It’s almost medical.” On needing shapewear with a tight dress, TINA FEY “I’ve kind of decided I’m going to be a good little hunk and shut up.” On not whining about his heartthrob…

Bend it like Prince Harry! The royal scored the winning goal at a May 16 game in New Zealand. “I’m losing my hair like him,” Ha rr y, who complimented a well-behaved 7-month-old May 12, admitted of taking after Prince Charles. He helped Australian wildlife rangers catch a 10-foot crocodile April 15. Hear him roar! The prince learned a military haka, a Maori ceremonial cry, in just 20 minutes May 13. A Royally Sweet Gesture! The 30-year-old won over University of Canterbury students with cupcakes May 12.…

“I really like boxing,” father of two Mario Lopez (in Miami April 11) has said. Daddy’s Day Off! Mark Wahlberg (in Barbados Jan. 2) took a break from his funky bunch of four kids. Orlando Bloom, who has son Flynn, 4, splashed in Cancun Dec. 28. Dad of four Michael Strahan cooled off in St. Bart’s March 29. Pop’s Washboard Abs! Chris Hemsworth’s Australia beach buddy Feb. 24? Daughter India, 3 (not pictured). Neil Patrick Harris vacationed in Hawaii with his husband and 4-yearold twins Jan. 7.…

NeNe Leakes’ love of nearly 20 years treats her more like a queen than a Housewife at their “castle” in sub urban Atlanta. “There are so many sweet things Gregg does for me,” the Bravo star, 47, tells Us of the investor, 60. “Cooking dinner, bringing me breakfast in bed.” The gestures aren’t exactly fifty-fifty, she jokes. “I don’t cook or anything! He’s romantic, but I’m weak in that department.”…

As the Duchess of Cambridge cares for her two under 2 — 22-month-old Prince George and 1-month-old Princess Charlotte — sister Pippa Middleton is looking after her. “Pippa arranged to have fresh juices delivered to Kate every three days,” says a family source. “It was a surprise treat. Kate used to blend her own juices and this is much easier.” (Last year the British press dubbed her “Smoothie Queen” for her purported love of the NutriBullet mini-mixer.) The new mum, 33, drinks the elixirs in her 10-bedroom Anmer Hall estate in Norfolk, but is not dieting, clarifies the confidant. “She just enjoys green juice in the morning. It’s Kate’s go-to for an extra boost.” Husband William, 32, is also a convert thanks to his 31-year-old sister-in-law, who is studying to…

● Michelle Monaghan, Ellen Pompeo and Ali Larter (above, from left) attending the Aviva 100th Anniversary “A” Gala for Relativity Media in L.A. ● Beyoncé arriving in Port-au-Prince, Haiti, to observe the progress made since the 2010 earthquake. ● Cyndi Lauper sending two bottles of Veuve Clicquot over to Rihanna’s table at 1 Oak in NYC. ● Benedict Cumberbatch and due-any-day wife Sophie Hunter cuddling in a booth at London’s Chiltern Firehouse. ● Drew Barrymore haggling with a children’s clothing vendor at the Melrose Trading Post in L.A. ● Liam Hemsworth playing Ping-Pong with a mystery blonde at the Standard Biergarten in NYC. ● Tori Spelling reuniting with Beverly Hills, 90210 costar Gabrielle Carteris at a Canine Companions for Independence and We TV party in L.A. ● Ansel Elgort watching…

SEXY STARS — JENNIFER LOPEZ! SOFÍA VERGARA! ADAM LEVINE! — SET THE TONE FOR SUMMER Call it the curious case of Jennifer Lopez. Two decades after debuting on In Living Color, the multi platinum singer and rom-com queen is even more fly. “I see pictures of myself in my twenties and go, ‘Oh, I look better now!’” the 45-year-old mom of twins Max and Emme, 7, admits to Us. Five-a-week hourlong dance sessions with trainer Tracy Anderson help, as does a concerted effort to eat more asparagus and fewer cookies. But when asked to explain the aging-in-reverse phenomenon, the 5-foot-5 “Booty” singer and Body Lab founder credits a new confidence. “You hit a stride where your spirit, mind and body all come together,” explains the single star. “I work out,…

THE WHIP Summer’s dance craze is here! Follow the leads of R&B star Tinashe (right) and “Nasty Freestyle” singer T-Wayne and extend your arm as if you’re driving a car while squatting. THINGS YOU WON’T SAY In bestselling author Sarah Pekkanen’s new novel, a Washington, D.C., family unravels after a tragic shooting. Hoda Kotb is hooked. ($16, amazon.com) LIFECELL SKINCARE AnnaLynne McCord hydrates her skin with this lightweight allin-one treatment. It’s packed with collagen to reduce wrinkles! ($189 for 2.54 ounces, lifecellskin.com) K-DEER HAUTE YOGA WEAR Say namaste like Andi Dorfman does to these flattering high-waist pants. The nylonspandex blend wicks away sweat. ($92, kdeerhaute yogawear.com) SPA SOPHIA Pink breathes easy at this L.A. beachbungalow getaway. Try the 60-minute jade-stone massage, which helps rid the body of toxins. ($85, spasophia.com)…

MONDAY 5/25 LOVE & HIP HOP LIVE: THE WEDDING Sean and Catherine Lowe are so last year. The It Couple of Love & Hip Hop: New York,Yandy Smith and Mendeecees Harris, say “I do” live. The parents of three will swap diamondencrusted eternity bands amid $100,000 worth of flowers — and the brave bride is even allowing fans to pick her wedding gown! (VH1, 8 P.M.) TUESDAY 5/26 AMERICA’S GOT TALENT It’s the competition’s 10th season, and judge Heidi Klum tells Us one act is a doozy: “He came on stage and said, ‘I’m a regurgitator.’ I could not believe what this guy did.” So there’s that. (NBC, 8 P.M.) TUESDAY 5/26 EXTREME WEIGHT LOSS Trainers Chris and Heidi Powell return to help 13 more obese souls get back on…