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The PictureThe Picture

The Picture Issue 1901

The Picture is an Australian men’s magazine aimed at the average bloke. It’s full of local stories, nude women, puzzles, prizes and jokes.

Bauer Media Pty Ltd
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26 Issues


access_time1 min.
stormy weather

IT’S been an upsy-downsy couple of weeks for Stormy Daniels, the porn star Donald Trump STILL reckons he never rooted. On the upside, the 39-year-old mattress actress topped the list of most searched stars on Pornhub, which is the bible when it comes to this sort of thing. She came out of nowhere to head the list, beating out much younger superstars such as Riley Reid, Mia Malkova, Nicole Aniston and Alexis Texas. Good for her. Go, Stormy go! On the other, much shittier, hand, she’s been hit with a bill for around A$400,000 for Donald Trump’s legal fees he incurred in her defamation case against him. Which should keep the The Don in fake tan for about a week. So, if ya wanna help Stormy out, buy some of her porn. Your todger will thank…

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big dreams

THE story of big-boobed newcomer Elle Faye is an uplifting one of joy and hope that will bring inspiration to the whole world. Especially those of us who love TITS. The aspiring Pommy model was suffering through her sad, empty, NORKLESS teenage years when something MIRACULOUS happened. “I had no boobs. I was like a rake!” Elle, now 25, wails. “Then I wished upon a shooting star and they just grew out of nowhere. And now if I put on weight it goes straight to my boobs or bum.” Isn’t that a lovely story? Excuse us while we sniff back a tear of happiness, readers. So, now equipped with a HUMUNGOUS set of H-cup hooters, it’s only logical that Elle decide to share them with the world through the wonder of NORKS-OUT MODELLING. She kicked off her…

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wobbly world

ARIZONA! Danica Jewels is from Russia, where it’s fucken freezing. Arizona was a bit too hot for her so she had to get naked. Sometimes things work out for the best. PRAGUE! After 15 years as one of Europe’s top-rated lezzo porn stars, Sophie Moone is so highly respected she can walk around in the nuddy anywhere she likes. OREGON! These three hotties had some time to kill before the World Naked Bike Ride in Portland, Oregon, so they nipped into a museum for a bit of NUDE CULTURE. MAJORCA! Pom model Stacey Poole loves her holidays on the Spanish island, where her G-cup titties can romp and play all day in the beaut warm sunshine. BRNO! Carrie comes from a city in the Czech Republic that is experiencing some major shortages – women’s clothing and VOWELS. You win…

access_time3 min.
news flash

50KG BARKER! YOU know your dog is a really FAT CUNT when he can’t fit in its own kennel. That’s what happened when this Border Collie, a long-term guest at the Gables Farm Dogs and Cats Home in Plymouth, England, hit the 50kg mark. Fuck knows what they were feeding him – DEEP FRIED CAT, probably – but he got so fat they re-named him Big Bopper the Whopper, and put him up for the title of Fattest Dog In Britain. ONE FOR THE ROAD YEAH, it’s sad when a beer truck tips over, spilling its load. Boo-fucken-hoo. Pass the fucken tissues. On the other hand, if you were in the vicinity of General Cañas Highway, San Jose, Costa Rica, recently, you would’ve been OVER-FUCKEN-JOYED to find free slabs and loose longnecks all…

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made by god!

JANA Czech babe Jana Defi set the standard for free-range knockers with her GG-cup GRUNIONS. Challengers come and go, but she’s still the champ – the Ali of tits! TESSA A little poem about Tessa Fowler: We must confess, the H-cup titties of luscious Tess, leave our pants all in a mess – oooooooh yesssssssss! BETH We hear that Pom model Beth Lily, 22, has retired her GG-cup norks from the spotlight and is growing prize-winning roses instead. But it’s just not the same. CLELIA Clelia Theodorou got famous in England by appearing on crap reality TV show The Only Way is Essex. But all she really needed to do was get her F-cup tits out. CLAUDIA Stacked Claudia Dean packs a pair of double-Ds that are as natural as bubbles in beer, and just as tasty. Matter of…

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flashin’ for fame!

AMBER ROSE When Amber isn’t getting enough attention for whatever it is she does, she hoicks a titty out and, bingo, she’s in the press. RITA ORA All the hit records in the world won’t do as much for your fame as dressing up as a bluebottle with your nips showing! LILY ALLEN A genius at knowing when to flash for maximum effect, Lily had a book to flog this year, so out came the gazongas right on cue. KATIE PRICE The hornbag previously known as Jordan hasn’t been famous for over 20 years without knowing when to get the twins out. KENDALL JENNER In a family where everyone is famous and they ALL get their tits out ALL the time, you have to keep one step ahead of your sisters. MEL B That’s the way to push your messy divorce…