category_outlined / Adult
The PictureThe Picture

The Picture Issue 1905

The Picture is an Australian men’s magazine aimed at the average bloke. It’s full of local stories, nude women, puzzles, prizes and jokes.

Bauer Media Pty Ltd
Read Morekeyboard_arrow_down
26 Issues


access_time1 min.
we love norks!

SERIOUSLY, readers, how good are tits? You couldn’t name a brand of tits we don’t love. Big, bouncy tits. Small, perky tits. Brown, tanned tits. Milky white tits. Tits that point up, tits that point down. Outgoing, friendly tits. Shy, reclusive tits. Aussie tits, French tits, Pom tits, Seppo tits. Thai tits, German tits, Zimbabwean tits, Russian tits or Estonian tits – they’re all terrific in our eyes. So every now and then we like to take a moment to give thanks that we live on a planet full of tits – BILLIONS of the champions – and that QUITE OFTEN, nice ladies let us look at theirs. And we think to ourselves, what a wonderful world……

access_time1 min.
reade all about tit!

SOPHIE Reade’s norks are the gift that keeps on giving. Just when you think they’ve reached peak norkitude, they seem to get even NORKIER. And every time they grow, so does her legion of fans. Even when they first appeared in public – in 2007, when the pommy model was just 18 – they were pretty bloody enormous. Back then they were rated a G-cup, and all-natural at that. But that wasn’t enough for young Sophie. After dipping a cup size due to weight loss, she decided to take control of the situation and had them boosted to a gob-smacking GG. Woweee-wah-wah-wah, indeed. Then she went on the 2009 season of UK Big Brother, and wouldn’t you know, due to all the pies and cakes they fed her on the show, not only did she…

access_time1 min.
wobbly world

MYKONOS! Six girls, one towel – what else are they supposed to do? It’s a human pyramid with Amy, Carli, and Jana, Faith, Nella and Zuzana. If they build it, we will come... NEW YORK! Texas-born porn star Leah Gotti, 21, likes to get her melons out wherever she is, even in the Big Apple. Well, why not? They look ripe to us. Sweet and juicy, too. ARKANSAS! It gets hot in Arkansas, Bill Clinton’s home state, so Harley Woodburn whips her double-D cups out to cool off. We predict Bill will be along any minute now. PRAGUE! What the fuck Yulia is doing sitting on a stump, nude, in the woods, we’re not sure. Two things, but – she looks fucken hot, and we’d all love to be that stump. LAS VEGAS! Keen gambler Courtney is trying out…

access_time3 min.
news flash

BIG BUCKS BINGLE A DELIVERY driver in Taiwan is up for $945,000 in PANEL-BEATING COSTS, and maybe a lick of paint, after totalling four Ferraris in a single crash. The uninsured bloke from New Taipei City rammed his van into three Ferrari 488s and a F12 Berlinetta when, he reckons, he had a bit of a nap at the wheel. Bet he woke up in a hurry. The good news is that an appeal to help him out has raised $245,000. The bad news is there’s still $700,000 to go. So if ya wanna chuck the bloke a fiver... ROCK ON, DUDE FULL marks to guitarist Bobby Jensen of Minnesota, USA, cover band Hairball for keeping the riff going when lesser men would’ve squealed, “Oh, shit me hair’s on fire!” and FUCKED RIGHT…

access_time1 min.
up ya kilt! part two

STEPH DAVIES The Pommy actor never quite got the legs-together-when-getting out-of-cars thing. MARIA MENOUNOS Actor, TV presenter, pro wrestler – about the only thing Maria can’t do is keep her smoo under wraps. IGGY AZALEA The Aussie rapper was getting sick of all the attention paid to her big, fat arse, so... OLIVIA WILDE For some reason every time the Seppo actress waxes her board, blokes around her wax the dolphin. CHARLOTTE MCKINNEY She starred in ads for the Carl’s Jnr burger chain so it’s only fair we see her fish taco. IRELAND BALDWIN She’s 183cm of angry, axe-wielding, smooflashing supermodel who obvioulsy can’t afford undies. ADRIANA LIMA So the Brazilian Victoria’s Secret model has a brazilian.Who would’ve guessed? OCH aye and MAC-FOOK, readers! Ever since I brought ye my selection of celebrity up-the-kilt smoo flashers in THE PICTURE #1463, there’s been a YOOOOOJ…

access_time2 min.
25 funbag facts!

1. When a chick is lactating, her breasts use more energy than her brain. 2. Japan hosts an annual event called Boob Aid in which men pay a thousand yen each to squeeze the breasts of porn stars, with all money going to charity. 3. The average bra cup size of Aussie women is a ‘D’, up one size in the past 10 years. 4. The world’s largest natural breasts belong to Seppo Annie Hawkins (aka Norma Stitz). Her choozies have an around-chest-over-nipple measurement of 177.8cm and fit a 48V bra. 5. Six per cent of people have a THIRD NIPPLE. 6. Seppo woman Donna Lange was arrested in 2013 after smothering her boyfriend to death with her tits. Police arrived to see Donna lying on top of her suffocated bloke. 7. The first breast augmentation…