Table of contents for 8/21/2019 in Move!

HE had nothing but the clothes on his back and sandals made from a rubber tyre on his feet when he decided to take the journey that would change his fortunes. Anyone who heard his plan would have told him it is impossible for him to walk from his home in Rwanda to South Africa. Yet Kennedy Gihana did just that, walking an incredible 6 000km to Mzansi with his matric certificate strapped to his body. It took him six months to get to Johannesburg and he faced many dangers along the way. But he overcame those and other obstacles to chase his dreams to become a lawyer. Kennedy is now a proud man of the law with his own firm. Read his story on page 24. His story shows…

HAVING A FORMAL AGREEMENT When all club members are friends and know one another very well, it can make sense to have a club that is not too strict or rigid when it comes to rules and regulations. But it can also be the downfall of the club. The lack of order may lead to chaos stemming from members doing as they please because they know there will be zero consequences for their behaviour. SOLVE IT There have been many instances where aSisters Forever Social Club meeting had to be delayed due to late arrivals. The women have tried starting the meeting without all members present but it proved to be counterproductive. Members arriving late often disrupted proceedings and asked questions that had already been asked or answered. Although formality…

HE’S been battling to come to terms with her passing. Not only was Nichume Siwundla his friend, but the singing sensation was also his protégé. To make matters worse, Mobi Dixon was accused of having a hand in her death and it pained him immensely. Nichume (27) died in June after jumping off a friend’s balcony in Greenstone, Johannesburg. Social media users wondered why the rising star had taken her life when her career was just taking off. It was Mobi Dixon, came the accusing claims. THEIR RELATIONSHIP The producer and record boss, who featured Nichume on his smash hit Thobela, was accused of not paying the singer, who had quit her job as an ophthalmologist to be mentored by him. Yes, Nichume was frustrated by a lack of money…

SHE wasn’t expecting to join one of South Africa’s most popular shows. Yet she is now one of Isibaya’s favourite characters. In 2018, Asavela Mngqithi (22) joined the cast of the Mzansi Magic show. The opportunity changed her life and the actress was able to not only pay off her tertiary debt, but also renovate her mother’s house. That is why she was heartbroken when the house was broken into by thugs with guns who also stole her car. THE BREAK-IN Asavela, who is from Lamontville, KwaZulu-Natal, has done a lot since landing her TV job last year. This includes being able to pay off her tertiary debt from Afda: The School for the Creative Economy in Durban. The actress, who dropped out of a film and editing qualification due…

About 10% of reported rape cases involve adult men being violated, says Rees Mann of the non-profit group South African Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse. “Rape is not about sex, it’s about power and control and it’s about humiliating the victim. Men are 10 times less likely to report they were raped. Our law enforcement isn’t trained to deal with it and there is the stigma of a male being raped. “Males are considered protectors, so the first question they get asked is, ‘Why didn’t you protect yourself?’ It’s commonly believed that if you were raped then you must be gay or the rape will change your sexual identity. “Males who do come forward are re-traumatised at police stations and are also not supported by their male friends. Male rape…

ALL he had were the clothes on his back and a pair of sandals made from an old rubber tyre. Kennedy Gihana was well aware he was hopelessly ill-equipped to walk almost 6 000km from Rwanda to South Africa – but he had no other choice. He’d been labelled a traitor and there was a target on his back. To stay would mean certain death. But to go also posed many life-threatening risks: on the remote back roads he planned to walk, the odds of encountering criminals, police and wild animals were high. Yet it was a risk worth taking. And so, early one morning in 1998, he started walking. He had no idea how he was going to fend for himself but along the way it soon became clear.…

DIAMOND RING A guy buys his wife a diamond ring. After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his says, “I thought she wanted one of those SUVs.” “She did,” he replies. “But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?” DO YOU KNOW ME? The office phone rings, one of the employees picks up and says: “What kind of an idiot is it that dares to phone me in the middle of my lunch break!?” The caller shouts back: “Do you have any idea whom you are talking to . . .? I am the CEO of this company!” The employee replies: “Do you have any idea whom YOU are talking to?” Perplexed the CEO mumbles: “NO!!!” The employee heaves a sigh of relieve and says: “Thank…

Q MY LIPS ARE CONSTANTLY DRY AND CRACKED. HOW CAN I KEEP THEM SOFT AND HYDRATED? A First you need to get rid of the dead skin by exfoliating your lips. Use an old toothbrush, wet wipes or a scrub you’ve made yourself by mixing sugar with olive oil. Once done, moisturise your lips thoroughly by using a lip balm or petroleum jelly. To prevent your lips from becoming dry again, avoid licking them because your saliva will dry them out further. You should also drink enough water and keep your lips moisturised with a lip balm for the perfect pout. CUTICLES Dry, ragged cuticles are often caused by cold weather. They’re not only unsightly, they can also be painful, so keep them hydrated by rubbing cuticle oil in daily.…

‘I’M PREGNANT AND MY BOYFRIEND IS REFUSING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY’ Q MY HUSBAND DOESN’T WANT TO WORK My husband refuses to work, saying he doesn’t have to since we are renting out properties and that the income is enough to sustain us. The reality is that isn’t true. We are not financially stable and have lots of debts. How can I divorce him without sharing assets? ANONYMOUS, MAMELODI A There is no law that says an adult must work. There is, however, a law that states that married spouses are legally obliged to support each other. If you are married in community of property, 50% of all assets belong to your husband and you have no choice but to share all assets. Assets are not the only things that will…

‘I RECENTLY DISCOVERED MY FATHER HAD TWO CHILDREN WITH OTHER WOMEN’ Q MY FAMILY DOESN’T LIKE MY BOYFRIEND I’ve been out of the dating game for about three years. I recently met someone who I think can make me happy, but my family doesn’t like him. They think he’s not good enough for me. I really like him and now I’m torn. How do I make them like him? ANONYMOUS, KWAMASHU A Although it’s ideal to be in a relationship that you know your family supports, it may not always be possible. On the other hand, it could be that your family is genuinely concerned about your wellbeing and want to protect you. They have told you their opinion about your man and should respect your decision and allow you…

It’s true – nothing can be done about changing positions while deep in sleep, says Dr Shaun Harper, head of Century Chiropractic in Cape Town. But, he does recommend that tummy-sleepers with problematic backs try going to sleep on their backs or sides and build a pillow wall. “If your doctor has recommended that you sleep on your side for any reason – like because you snore or have back pain – you can put a pillow behind your back and another in front that will help prevent you from turning onto your back or stomach while sleeping,” he says.…

I’m getting married in a couple of months and I couldn’t be more excited. My friends suggested my man and I have marriage counselling before walking down the aisle, as it can apparently prevent problems in the future. They say it will prepare us for the journey ahead and that if one of us is not ready, we can postpone marriage until later. Why is marriage counselling important, what issues are addressed and how many sessions should we attend? I need clarity before I get into something I don’t know anything about.…

If your car starts acting up soon after you’ve bought it, take it back to the dealership you bought it from rather than trying to have it fixed yourself. If you get work done on the car before taking it back to the dealership, it’s easy for the dealer to say the car was in working condition when you bought it and that the work you had done was what damaged it. Your chances of then proving that the car was defective when you bought it will then decrease dramatically. So don’t risk it.…

MANY of us live in condemnation for things we did or said in the past and fail to enjoy salvation. Why is it so hard to forgive yourself, yet so easy to forgive others? Bishop Keith Harrington and Pastor Sibusiso Mfeka share why living in the past isn’t a life. FORGIVE YOURSELF Bishop Harrington says self-forgiveness is understanding that making mistakes is part of a learning process. “It’s about picking up the pieces, learning from your errors and striving to do better the next time.” Pastor Mfeka says not forgiving damages you and your relationships. “When you don’t forgive yourself, you will not easily forgive others. You will want to pass on the hurt you feel inside to others. And that can tarnish relationships because even people who are new…

Is lobola still something that is important and relevant in modern society? Move! readers have their say. Lobolais part of our tradition. It seems, as black people, we are adapting to the western way of doing things. Lobola is not only about the money, there are other things that also bring the families together. MARGARET RAMASALA Lobola is one of the things that puts a value to African women and the respect for the family of the makoti. If lobola has been paid for you, you are arespected, valued African woman! LOBIANE NICKNEL MABOTE I love and respect my culture. Lobola it is still relevant and it will be forever. NOMONDE MCHUNU It’s now just a money-making scheme. Some women marry to get divorced, then go look for another victim…

SHE decided to release her new song in August, a month that celebrates women, because it is a piece of music that celebrates us. The new single, Ixesha, reminds women of their power, Winnie Khumalo (46) says. It also encourages us to stand up for what we believe in. “The song will also remind women to take their time in making life decisions. ‘THE SONG WILL ALSO REMIND WOMEN TO TAKE THEIR TIME IN MAKING LIFE DECISIONS’ “It says to wait and think instead of going too fast, rushing into situations that they most probably don’t need for their futures,” she tells Move!. We caught up with the songbird to hear more about her new track. HER MUSICAL JOURNEY Winnie’s love for music was sparked when she listened to Miriam…

LIRA has many firsts on her list of achievements: in the early 2000s she debuted as an R&B singer; she’s the first local singer to have her song played on American sitcom Girlfriends; and this week, as part of Barbie’s Shero #MoreRoleModels campaign, Barbie honoured the songbird. Lira joins the global line-up of women inspiring girls everywhere. “I am honoured,” she tells Move!. “To think that I was once insecure about my dark skin and about being the tallest girl with the longest legs in my group of friends; for having a big, toothy-smile; and ngingapakanga (for having small curves),” she says. The reveal of her one-of-a-kind Barbie doll took place at the Munro Boutique Hotel in Houghton, Joburg, and is another way the singer is hoping to inspire young…

Make your leopard-print blouse the focus of your look by wearing black items and accessories. The bold beret and green bag complete this look. Make gold hoop earrings your only jewellery items. Elegant gold accessories make this chic outfit stand out. Wear peep-toe heels for a flirtier party look. Stick to neutral colours when picking accessories and swop your heels for sneakers for a more casual look.…

CRUSTY PIZZA MAKES 2 LARGE PIZZAS PREPARATION: 15 MIN RISING: 40 MIN COOKING: 15 MIN DOUGH ■ 200ml (¾c) lukewarm water ■ 5ml (1t) sugar ■ 5ml (1t) instant dry yeast ■ 500ml (2c) flour ■ 5ml (1t) salt CRUST ■ 60ml (¼c) polenta TOPPING ■ 60ml (4T) tomato sauce ■ 1 red onion, sliced ■ 200g smoked Russians, sliced ■ 250ml (1c) mozzarella cheese, grated ■ 2 green chillies, chopped Preheat oven to 220°C. 1 Dough In a bowl, combine the water, sugar and yeast and stir until the yeast dissolves. 2 Add the flour and salt and mix until a rough dough forms. 3 Turn the dough out onto a lightly-floured work surface. Knead until all the flour is incorporated. If it sticks, sprinkle more flour onto the…

THE first episode of e.tv’s soap drama Isipho: The Gift launched last month and the number of viewers are growing daily. It stars Nimrod Nkosi as Moses Shezi, a father who unlocks and teaches people with supernatural gifts how to manage their talent. We meet his brave daughter, Ntombi Shezi, played by Precious Ngidi, who uncovers deceptive dealings at the company she works at as a research scientist. She’s determined to do everything in her power to make things right – even if it costs her life. FIRED ON THE SPOT Ntombi just bought a car and an apartment after securing a job at pharmaceutical company Impilo Labs. She’s excited about her future. However, things turn sour when she discovers the company manufactures pills that have anegative side-effect on consumers’…

‘MY HUSBAND EJACULATES BEFORE WE HAVE SEX AND THIS IS VERY FRUSTRATING.’ Q HE HAS NO SEXUAL DESIRE My partner and I have been dating for three years. He is diabetic and has no sex drive. Because of this we can’t have sex. I always masturbate but I want to feel close to him. What should I do? ANONYMOUS, ATTERIDGEVILLE A Diabetes can cause sexual hurdles – it reduces libido and directly affects the erection itself. It’s crucial you share your frustration in a loving manner with the aim of finding a solution. Support your partner and make sure you are fully involved, including going to the doctor with him. Talk with the doctor and share your frustration. There are many things that can be done. Depending on the doctor’s…

Mandisa Muruge, a counsellor at The Family Life Centre’s Lenasia South office, says: “Have you spoken to your boyfriend about this? You cannot consider marriage when you still have such serious issues within your relationship. “A child is not something you can wish will disappear, and your boyfriend must understand that you are a package – your child is part of you. “Explain your feelings about the way he is treating your child, and how that does not sit well with you. He must either accept your child or move on to find a woman with no child. “He does not treat you fairly if he expects you to treat his child with love and doesn’t do the same with your daughter. Please consider premarital counselling. You can also contact…

The firmer the mattress, the better, says Dr Abdul Gangat from Adjust Your Health chiropractic clinic in Pinelands, Cape Town. But the same principle doesn’t apply to pillows. “If you are apetite person with a long neck and narrow shoulders, you’ll need a different pillow to a heavyset guy with a fat neck, for example.” Pillows should be tailored to the individual, he says, and you should be guided by what’s most comfortable for you. If you’re unsure, take your pillow to a physiotherapist or chiropractor and ask their opinion.…

TINOE SHAVA It’s important to go for counselling. It is basically preparing you for marriage. It teaches you about how to relate to each other, in-laws, finances, trust and other responsibilities. ZOTHANDO NTENTULE Counselling is important, but you can’t postpone your wedding because you didn’t go for counselling. You can still have sessions afterwards. AUBREY MNISI I have been married for two years and we never went for premarital counselling but I am still happy. Yes, there are challenges but we are coping.…

IT IS time to engage in your destiny. It is time to be an active participant and not just a spectator of your dreams and vision, to be deliberate in your walk with God. You cannot afford to be passive and still expect the power of God to manifest in your life. Throughout the scripture we read how before a miracle could take place or change be done, those in need had to be actively involved. God has assigned you your destiny and its fulfilment needs you to depend on Him for guidance. Wake up and realise there is an important assignment you must fulfil. PARTICIPATE IN LIFE Renowned American pastor Rick Warren writes, “Your life is not an accident. You have adestiny, one that only you can complete.” To…

1 You and your partner are watching a horror movie late at night when your partner gets tired and goes to bed before you. Do you .. .? A Enjoy watching the rest of the movie. B Watch the movie, then have nightmares. C Go to bed too – you’re too frightened to watch the movie on your own. 2 In a bid to raise money for charity, a group of your friends intend to spend the night in a supposedly haunted house. Would you .. .? A Be too frightened and make up an excuse not to go with them. B Go reluctantly and stay in a group all the time. C Go along, sure it will be a good laugh. 3 Your best friend sets you up with…

Don’t give out private information, such as your ID number, physical address and banking details to strangers. If you decide to meet, do so in a public place. Also, tell a friend where you are going and when you expect to be back. Don’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Always trust your instincts. Don’t assume that the person is who they say they are. It’s easy to pretend or provide false information over the phone or online. DISCLAIMER: Move! magazine will not be held responsible/liable for anything that may arise with regard to readers providing each other with personal information. We advise participants to protect themselves from any criminal intent/ activity.…

IT WAS always too good to be true. How could someone so power-hungry and conniving accept that her man has moved on when she still has her sights firmly set on him? Fans of vindictive Lindiwe in 1Magic’s The River will know this good-girl act is all just fake. After all, she’s proven she’ll go to any lengths to get what she wants. And what she wants right now is her ex, Zweli, who has lost his heart to poor Gail. If Gail had any sense she wouldn’t sleep in the same house as the queen of scheming. We chat to Sindi Dlathu, who brings evil Lindiwe to life; Mary-Anne Barlow, who plays unsuspecting Gail; and Hlomla Dandala, who plays Zweli, the man they both want. GOOD VERSUS EVIL “It’s…

GOOD and genuine friendships are hard to find – even more so if you’re in the same industry, auditioning for similar roles. But TV stars Zola Nombona (27) and Busisiwe Trinity Mtshali (28) are fortunate to have a friendship that has spanned over nine years and they’re best friends. The actresses, who met in varsity, say God and honesty are the glue to their good relationship. Zola and Busi have been fortunate enough to have worked together on Mzansi Magic’s Lockdown, an experience Busi says was one of the best things that has happened to her. STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM In 2010, Zola and Busi met in their first year at Wits University, studying drama. Former Ring of Lies actress Busi initially wanted to study microbiology but had a change…

HE remembers as if it were yesterday. It was the middle of the night and he was fast asleep when a noise woke him. He saw then that in his room was the man who had come on to him at a party. Olwethu Twalo had told him he wasn’t interested and thought that would be the end of it. Instead it was the start of an ordeal that would leave Olwethu violated, humiliated and traumatised. THE NIGHTMARE “He broke into my room, forced me back on my bed and began to rape me,” Olwethu (29) says. When the man was done he stole Olwethu’s cellphone, a chain and his toiletry bag, and snuck out. This happened four years ago on Christmas Eve, when family and friends were celebrating the…

1 Zodwa Wabantu recently called off her engagement and requested half her . . . back? A Engagement ring BWedding dress C Gifts D Lobola 2 On which mountain did Moses receive the Ten Commandments? A Mount Zion B Mount Carmel C Mount Sinai D Mount Moriah 3 What is the name of the title character in Victor Hugo’s classic book The Hunchback of Notre-Dame? A Hugo B Quasimodo C Esmeralda D Simba 4 Which country recently closed its border with the DRC due to an Ebola outbreak? A Angola B Rwanda CTanzania D Uganda 5 Herpes zoster is another name for which disease? A Shingles B Warts C Smallpox D Chickenpox 6 What is the current unemployment rate in South Africa? A 17% B 27,3% C 29% D 30%…

Q I’M PETITE. HOW SHOULD I DRESS TO APPEAR TALLER? A An obvious answer would be to don a pair of killer heels, but your clothes also play a significant part and there are a few clothing tricks that will make you look taller. First, avoid wearing contrasting colours, for example a bright top and darker pants. These will cut your silhouette in half, and you don’t want that. Rather wear matching colours that won’t break your shape but add the illusion of height. Crop tops with high-waisted pants or skirts are the perfect combination for a petite woman. They lengthen the appearance of your legs. Finally, say hello to your new best friend – waist-fitted dresses. These staple gems look fabulous on petite sizes because they stretch the silhouette…

RECENTLY we watched thousands participate in the ultimate race of endurance, the Comrades Marathon. Leading up to the big day, the runners had prepared themselves physically, mentally, psychologically and emotionally to cross the finishing line. This got me thinking about our race with HIV, which also requires mastering different aspects of our lives to win. FOCUS ON YOUR GOAL ‘I KNEW VICTORY OVER HIV MEANT MORE THAN JUST TAKING MY ARVS’ It all begins with a goal. Just like the runners who have a purpose, your goal is to conquer HIV. This means being disciplined about taking your ARVs with the full conviction that you want to strengthen your immune system so the disease can be suppressed. Failing to stick to your plan will prevent you from accomplishing your goal.…

YOU may have heard the word aphrodisiac, which is something that can turn you on and make you want sex. Some say there are certain foods that are aphrodisiacs, but is this really the case? Scientific research says that food can’t suddenly make you want to have sex but there are certain foods that can help put you in the mood. As respected health website WebMD.com puts it, “No food has been scientifically proven to stimulate the human sex organs. But foods and the act of eating can suggest sex to the mind, which in turn can help stimulate desire in the body.” We look at a few that are regularly referred to as aphrodisiacs. CHOCOLATE This sweet treat, often given as a romantic gesture of love, can actually make you…