Inhoudsopgave van September 2015 - Empire

IllustratIon: olly gIbbs APOLOGIES TO SPIDER-MAN, BUT THE TWO GREAT comic-book heroes — the ones who have always transcended the lushly coloured boxes their creators tried to cage them in — are in many ways complete opposites, an implacable hatred of villainy aside. Superman lives by day; wields his omnipotence responsibly; and as he lines up with the military to take on General Zod in Man Of Steel, looks comfortable on the side of the establishment. Batman is solidly nocturnal; his powers are manmade, not super; and at its best, his relationship with the law is uneasy tolerance. But mano a mano, who would triumph? Superman is the odds-on favourite, but would you bet against Batman springing a surprise? You might get a clue on the outcome from our exclusive…

What is it? It’s George Lucas’ latest, an animated yarn directed by ILM sound guru Gary Rydstrom. Didn’t Lucas retire after Red Tails? No, he’s still a producer. This is a magical yarn based loosely on A Midsummer Night’s Dream, in which warrior princess Marianne (Evan Rachel Wood) falls for forest king Bog (Alan Cumming). Cumming and Wood, eh? Doesn’t sound suitable for kids. On the contrary: Lucas says it was designed for 12 year-old girls. Who are into ELO? Well, it is named after an ELO song, but there are other tunes. Ever wanted to hear Deep Purple’s Mistreated sung by Alan Cumming? Now that’s strange magic! You’ll like it. Not a lot, though, judging from its iffy US reception earlier this year... STRANGE MAGIC IS OUT ON AUGUST…

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever put in your mouth? A cockroach. To make Tom Hollander barf. Who were you in your first school play? The Scarecrow. I was trying to get hold of Dorothy, but she ran off with the Tin Man. Have you ever kept any souvenirs from a movie shoot? Every shoot. My favourite is Thomas Button’s chair from Benjamin Button. There’s a zombie apocalypse. Where do you hole up? Hide out in an abandoned house at the Colony in Malibu. There’s nothing in front of you but the ocean, so you’d only have to guard one way. How much is a pint of milk? I’m in Los Angeles at the moment, so 89 cents. Aliens land and ask to see a Jason Flemyng double bill. What…

Gemma Bovery OUT AUGUST 21 / CERT. 15 / 99 MINS. DIRECTOR Anne Fontaine CAST Fabrice Luchini, Gemma Arterton, Jason Flemyng Fabrice Luchini turns Gallic cliché to his advantage as the baker piqued by newcomer Arterton’s romantic escapades. But, while the Norman vistas are glorious, the storytelling lacks wit and charm. PP The Treatment OUT AUGUST 21 / CERT. 18 / 131 MINS. DIRECTOR Hans Herbots CAST Geert Van Rampelberg, Ina Geerts Cop Geert Van Rampelberg, traumatised by the unsolved disappearance of his young brother, investigates a series of horrific home invasions. Tough stuff, but worth a look for Eurocrime fans. KN Theeb OUT AUGUST 14 / CERT. TBC / 100 MINS. DIRECTOR Naji Abu Nowar CAST Jacir Eid, Hassan Mutlag, Hussein Salameh This confident debut explores the passing of…

One Ewok film you’re not likely to see anytime soon is Return Of The Ewok: a 24-minute short directed by David Tomblin during the production of The Return Of The Jedi. Starring Warwick Davis, it offers a peculiar, fictionalised version of how Davis came to be cast as Wicket. Davis believes he owns the only copy. Tomblin was a second unit and assistant director on Return Of The Jedi, giving him and Davis enviable access to the cast and crew for their side project. Mostly shot during lunch breaks and weekends, Tomblin and Davis were able to press gang Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Anthony Daniels, David Prowse, Peter Mayhew, Frank Oz, Jeremy Bulloch and others into playing along. Their story follows Davis first pursuing his dream of becoming…

Focus FROM NOW / CERT. 15 Hitch meets Hustle, this sees Will Smith play con-artist mentor to Margot Robbie’s rookie, teaching her the ropes before they become adversaries in a motor-racing scam. It’s lightweight, but the stars are engaging, the look is swish, the storytelling has neat quirks and BD Wong is off the hook in a memorable set-piece. IF The Gunman FROM NOW / CERT. 15 This globetrotting thriller tries to reinvent Sean Penn as a beefcake Bryan Mills. A corporate conspiracy unfolds involving Javier Bardem’s panto villain but, one fiery villa showdown aside, it all gets bogged down in sub-le Carré plotting. Sidney Lumet might have done something with this material. Pierre Morel is not Sidney Lumet. PDS Robot Overlords FROM NOW / CERT. 12 That it feels…

Holidays Gone Wrong IN THE BORING REAL WORLD, vacation horrors rarely escalate beyond dodgy buffets, crispy sunburn and mild budget-airline thrombosis. On Planet Movie, however, the holiday-by-mistake is a spin-off of the survival movie: escape turns to endurance, foreigners froth and civilisation perishes. In a baffling genre quirk, there’s also much gratuitous dogicide. Preservation is a formula wilderness horror designed like a Deliverance package holiday. Urbanites go deer-hunting. Wake up with crosshairs on their foreheads. Accompanying its bear traps and dead dogs is a pungent sense of déjà-view. The masked killers are bored kids. A lone female fights back. It’s Eden Lake with a Californian accent — it even nicks the cesspit scene. Netflix’s algorithms are jammed. Although set in 1970s Spain, The Backwoods is Preservation all over again: flustered…

FROM NOW / CERT. 15 DIMINISHING RETURNS EVER SINCE James Cameron declared himself done with his rowdy robot, Hollywood has been trying to revive the lucrative Terminator franchise with the desperation of a frustrated householder belting a faulty telly with a spanner. The magic, though, has proven hard to recapture. The first two films were, after all, almost perfect bedfellows: the first a wiry piece of Corman-esque hokum that exploited its high concept — robot from future comes to kill mother of its nemesis — with a relentless efficiency that mirrors its protagonist’s singleness of purpose. The second vitally cemented Cameron’s storytelling skills, the potentially mawkish switch of Arnie from slaughterbot to cyber-saviour delivered with miraculous smoothness. Sadly Terminator 3 was a bodge job which staggered out from the wreckage…

Hawk The Slayer 1980 FROM NOW CERT. PG Tolkien staged as regional panto, this disco-enhanced ’80s fantasy is even more endearingly awful on Blu-ray, its crummy FX hopelessly exposed in hi-def (hello, silly-string magic spells). Dressed like Darth Discount, Jack Palance goes beyond scenery-chewing — he swallows the entire cast. With, somehow, Carry On’s Bernard Bresslaw as a giant who likes eating chicken. Splendud. The Yellow Balloon 1953 FROM NOW CERT. PG Before Hollywood called, J. Lee Thompson cut his teeth on working-class Brit-thrillers: this tale of menaced innocence echoes his own Cape Fear as an icy sociopath stalks a naive kid. Set in a world of rations and spivs where stolen pineapples are like gold bullion, post-War banality meets sinister Hitchcockian suspense. 3 Women 1977 FROM NOW CERT. PG…

Star Trek STAR TREK: THE REBEL UNIVERSE 1987 Tedious bridge simulator with little action and far too much scanning for class M planets. STAR TREK: TNG — A FINAL UNITY 1995 Proper away-team action arrived in this point-and-click adventure, voiced by the Next Gen cast. STAR TREK: ARMADA 2000 Real-time strategy where you could play as the Borg fleet and assimilate the universe. Resistance is futile. STAR TREK: ELITE FORCE II 2003 Trek isn’t known for its gunfights so this created a Voyager commando team to phaser up the Delta Quadrant. STAR TREK ONLINE 2010 Don’t just play Star Trek, live Star Trek. A scary thought, but if you’ve always wanted to be a Betazoid...…

OWEN WILLIAMS Straight Outta Compton & Ewoks (p.94 & p.100) “I was surprised how well those Ewok movies hold up: we dismissed them as Star Wars kids, but three decades on they’re kind of charming. Ice Cube was charming too, if a little less cuddly.” DAVID VENNI Amy Schumer photography (p.70) “I’ve shot many comedians, most of whom are very uncomfortable in front of a camera. I think Amy would have been great to shoot anyway, but throw in two male models in various states of undress and it was a recipe for success.” NEV PIERCE Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (p.110) “Having covered Maze Runner, it was fun to revisit cast and crew for The Scorch Trials. Dylan O’Brien has a charm and athleticism that would well suit the…

HEAT VS. RIGHTEOUS KILL TONY MONTANA’S LITTLE FRIEND Colt AR-15 with M203 Grenade Launcher attachment PACINO BY NUMBERS 5’ 7” HEIGHT 9 “HOO-AH!”S IN SCENT OF A WOMAN 4’ 33” DURATION OF HIS INCHES SPEECH IN ANY GIVEN SUNDAY OSCARS NOMINATIONS: 1973: Best Supporting Actor, The Godfather 1974: Best Actor, Serpico 1975: Best Actor, The Godfather Part II 1976: Best Actor, Dog Day Afternoon 1980: Best Actor, ÉAnd Justice For All 1991: Best Supporting Actor, Dick Tracy 1993: Best Supporting Actor, Glengarry Glen Ross OSCAR WINS: 1993: Best Actor, Scent Of A Woman PEOPLE OFFED BY MICHAEL CORLEONE IN THE GODFATHER TRILOGY: * Killed by Michael Corleone’s own hands. The rest are murdered at his request BOX OFFICE $134,966,411 THE GODFATHER $26,282 TWO BITS Number of $100 million movies: 3…

EXPERIENCE 1984 Gremlins Writer I’d run the pages to Steven Spielberg’s office, he’d write some edits in the margins while I waited as he was having a meeting with someone like Harrison Ford. It was a graduate school of filmmaking. 1985 The Goonies Writer When I was doing Harry Potter, the 21-year-olds on the set would say, “That film changed my life.” I thought they meant Home Alone, but it was always Goonies. 1985 Young Sherlock Holmes Writer I’m a Sherlock Holmes fanatic. I was obsessed with David Lean when I was writing and saw Great Expectations and Oliver Twist, and I thought, “I want to set this in Victorian England.” I did a lot of research in the era, I wanted it to be authentic and when I finished…

ADAM SANDLER CAREER GRAPH* (US DOMESTIC BOX OFFICE ONLY) HAPPY GILMORE THE WEDDING SINGER THE WATERBOY BIG DADDY LITTLE NICKY MR. DEEDS PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE ANGER MANAGEMENT REIGN OVER ME YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN FUNNY PEOPLE GROWN UPS THAT’S MY BOY GROWN UPS 2 MEN, WOMEN & CHILDREN THE TOP 10 BEST PICTURE WINNERS (DOMESTIC) 1 TITANIC $600.8 MILLION 2 THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING $377.0 MILLION 3 FORREST GUMP $329.6 MILLION 4 GLADIATOR $187.7 MILLION 5 DANCES WITH WOLVES $184.2 MILLION 6 RAIN MAN $172.8 MILLION 7 A BEAUTIFUL MIND $170.7 MILLION 8 CHICAGO $170.6 MILLION 9 SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE $141.3 MILLION 10 PLATOON $138.5 MILLION MOVIE INFLATION IN 1988, DIE HARD’S HANS GRUBER ATTEMPTED TO STEAL C640 MILLION IN BEARER BONDS FROM THE…

• ALLSTAR/DI.ENSION FIL.S, 2014 FOCUS FEATURES, LLC, GETTY GETTY II. .AGES AGES, , ALLSTAR ALLSTAR//HOYAPRODUCTIONS HOYAPRODUCTIONS, , REX REX FEATURES FEATURES Paul Rudd grew up reading British comics like The Beano and The Dandy. Cripes! Michael Smiley is a mean table tennis player. If you see him approaching you with a ping pong bat in his hand, run. Although she’s the star of Fatal Attraction, Glenn Close is not a fan of scary films. Ant-Man star Michael Peña lost his luggage when he came to the UK recently. Perhaps he should have checked his trouser pockets.…

AUGUST 1 “Sam Mendes! ( Wah-wahwaaaah ) He’s the man, the man with a birthday cake!” Yep, the Spectre director turns 50 — or 0050 — today. AUGUST 2 In 2003, Jim and Michelle finally have an American wedding in, erm, American Wedding. AUGUST 3 On this day in 2032, Simon Phoenix escapes from prison in Demolition Man. It’ll take a sly one to catch him. AUGUST 4 Skynet goes online in 1997. Don’t worry, we’re sure nothing bad will come of it. AUGUST 5 “To Benedict, or not to Benedict…” Yes, Mr. Cumberbatch debuts as the tortured Danish Prince in The Barbican’s Hamlet. Good luck getting a ticket.hamlet-barbican.com AUGUST 6 The brilliant outdoor film festival, Film4 Summer Screen, begins at London’s Somerset House with the premiere of Gemma Bovery.…

Wonder Woman AKA: Princess Diana of Themyscira, Diana Prince ORIGIN: Amazonian warrior princess. POWERS: Super-strength and agility, flight, owns the Bracelets Of Submission, the Lasso Of Truth, a super-sharp sword. Also an invisible jet. THE CHALLENGE: Fitting the pseudo-Greek myth into Snyder’s ‘real’ world; keeping her micro-skirt semi-decent; the invisible jet. The Flash AKA: Barry Allen. Or Wally West. Or Jay Garrick. Or Bart Allen. ORIGIN: Depends on which Flash. If Ezra Miller’s playing Barry, then he’s a scientist transformed by lightning-struck chemicals. POWERS: Super-duper speed. THE CHALLENGE: The CW’s bright, breezy Flash TV show is already proving popular. Would a ‘darker’ take wash? Aquaman AKA: Arthur Curry. Or Orin, The King Of The Seven Seas. ORIGIN: His dad’s human, his mum’s from Atlantis. POWERS: Underwater breathing, super-swimming, sealife control.…

Apple V Android: Dawn Of Not-Just-OS Steve Jobs’ mobile operating system seemed set to be the world-beating conversation annihilator. But then Google went and designed their own. LIKELY VICTOR: The Cupertino Crusher, Apple. Less evil. Probably. Pepsi V Coca-Cola: Dawn Of Best-Served-With-Ice The war of the tooth-rotters has rumbled since upstart Pepsi entered the market a mere seven years after an Atlanta boffin patented Coca-Cola, his “potion for mental and physical disorders”, in 1886. LIKELY VICTOR: Pepsi consistently wins in blind taste tests until people find out what it is. So it’s The Real Thing. The X-Factor V Strictly Come Dancing: Dance Of Justice Surviving even the retirement of Bruce ‘Bruce’ Forsyth, the battle betwixt ITV’s talent fandango and the BBC’s ballroom smackdown regularly turns living rooms into battlegrounds. LIKELY…

The Day Of The Locust (1975) Among the celebrity lookalikes attending the 1938 Tinseltown premiere that degenerates into a riot in John Schlesinger’s sour adaptation of Nathanael West’s uncompromising novel is Dick Powell Jr. — posing as his crooner father, star of many Busby Berkeley musicals and later a notable screen tough guy. Edith et Marcel (1983) Before Marion Cotillard won an Oscar playing songstress Edith Piaf, Evelyne Bouix took the role in this gossipy Claude Lelouch production which focuses on the romance between Piaf and boxer Marcel Cerdan, who was played by his own son, Marcel Cerdan Jr.. NB: Piaf wasn’t his mother, which is good because that would have been weird… Sophia Loren: Her Own Story (1990) In addition to playing herself in this TV movie biopic, Loren…

Electric Boogaloo: The Wild Untold Story Of Cannon Films FROM NOW / CERT. 18 Throughout the ’80s, Cannon Films unleashed an astonishing schlock-wave on the world. Space-vampires, aerobics-ninjas, feuding break-dancers and Chuck Norris’ beard: all feature in this fun, pacy documentary. The stories are great, the clips even better. NDS Miss Meadows FROM NOW / CERT. 15 Ever wished Katie Holmes would play a tap-dancing serial killer? Thought not. Someone did, though, and so we have this lumpy satire about a troubled teacher who turns into Charles Bronson out of class. An inadvertent companion piece to the better The Voices, it features a CG bluebird, an excess of rhyming couplets and a dearth of wit. NDS The Falling FROM AUGUST 17 / CERT. 15 Carol Morley follows up Dreams Of…

Good Kill FROM AUGUST 3 / CERT. 15 Ethan Hawke stars as a reluctant drone pilot in Andrew Niccol’s thought-provoking exploration of modern warfare. Torn between his Vegas family-guy existence and his day job killing targets thousands of miles away, Hawke perfectly captures a decent man falling apart in the face of impossible moral quandaries. LB Timbuktu FROM AUGUST 10 / CERT. 12 With stunning insight and huge restraint, Abderrahmane Sissako takes on religious extremism as Islamic fundamentalists invade the titular city. Although it doesn’t shrink from harsh realities, it is far from a slog. A love of humanity shines through this engaging film, which avoids crude conclusions and refuses to mire itself in misery. ES Clouds of Sils Maria FROM NOW / CERT. 15 A restless thespian is threatened…

ILLUSTRATION INFOMEN 1 The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015) Piazza di Spagna Guy Ritchie’s latest knocks off more sites of historical note than bad guys. He shot brief daytime scenes at the Piazza Venezia, but more extensive night shoots took place at the Piazza di Spagna at the base of the Spanish Steps. Interestingly, John Keats lived there, but he was a rubbish spy next to Solo and Kuryakin. 2 La Dolce Vita (1960) Trevi Fountain Quite near the Piazza Di Spagna is this symbol of Rome, the site of maybe the coolest moment in movie history. After a night wandering the city’s alleyways, Anita Ekberg’s starlet wades into the Trevi and just dances. The polizia nowadays stop the millions of tourists trying to follow her lead. 3 Hudson Hawk (1991)…

ENEMY If yousre in the mood to have your mind bent into intere’ting new ’hape’, you could do a lot wor’e than thi’ trippy noir, in which Jake Gyllenhaals’ hi’tory profe’’or encounter’ a doppelgänger of him’elf. (FROM NOW) STAR WARS: THE COMPLETE SAGA With the Force awakening ’hortly, Sky ha’ provided the ultimate primer: all the film’, plu’ documentarie’, trailer’ and epi’ode’ of the Clone War’ animated ’erie’. Keep you bu’y, it will. (FROM NOW) INTERSTELLAR Chri’topher Nolans’ ’ci-fi epic i’ built for repeat viewing’. Recreate the IMAX experience by turning the volume way up, then ’itting on the floor with your no’e pre’’ed up again’t the TV. (FROM NOW) WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER: FIRST DAY OF CAMP The cult 2001 comedy now ha’ a prequel, in the form of…

1. Match the tagline to the Terminator film. 1 “THE BATTLE FOR TOMORROW HAS BEGUN...” 2 “IT’S NOTHING PERSONAL.” 3 “RESET THE FUTURE.” 4 “THE END BEGINS.” 5 “THE THING THAT WON’T DIE, IN THE NIGHTMARE THAT WON’T END.” 2. Which two ACTRESSES have played John Connor’s wife, Kate Brewster? 3. Name the TERMINATOR franchise’s four DIRECTORS. 4. Match the “I’LL BE BACK” referencing line from the non-Terminator movie. A ÒIÕLL BE BACK, BENNETT.Ó B “KILLIAN, I’LL BE BACK.” C ÒIF YOUÕRE LYING TO ME, IÕLL BE BACK!Ó D “I’M BACK.” E ÒITÕS NICE TO BE BACK.Ó F “I’LL BE BACK.... HA! YOU DIDN’T KNOW I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT, DID YOU?” G ÒIÕLL BE BACK WITH THE DOLL LATER.Ó H “I MIGHT BE BACK.” I ÒYOUÕVE BEEN BACK…

BACK IN TIME AUTHOR CASEEN GAINES / OUT NOW EVERY GOOD ‘making of’ story needs a bump or two on the highway to glory. Jurassic Park got hit by a hurricane. Aguirre: Wrath Of God was blighted by a demented, gun-toting Klaus Kinski. Back To The Future, meanwhile, had Eric Stoltz. Hot off his turn in The Mask, Stoltz was cast as Marty McFly. But it quickly became apparent that this tortured Method artist, who insisted his co-stars call him ‘Marty’, was not a good fit for the high-energy role. Zemeckis was forced to step in, firing him and drafting in original choice Michael J. Fox. Finally, McFly took flight. Though it ties in with the movie’s 30th anniversary, this book by super-fan Caseen Gaines is not an authorised tome.…

DEADPOOL VS. KATNISS EDWARD STONE, FACEBOOK That Indiana Jones original concept poster by Tom Jung you put on your subscribers’ cover? It’s BEAUTIFUL! JACK KENNERLY (@JACK_KAY) SHEER MAGNETISM Correction! In Live And Let Die, Roger Moore’s Bond uses his magnetic watch to unzip the dress of Italian agent Miss Caruso (Madeline Smith), not Solitaire’s, as stated in the latest issue. Has someone been sniffing Tipp-Ex again? DAVID BRADSHAW Our mistake! But as they say, live and let... He’s not British, sure, but can someone PLEASE knight Jeff Goldblum? Ideally the Queen, but I’m not fussy. “Arise, Sir Jeff,” feels so right. DOMINIQUE NICOLE JOHNSON, VIA FACEBOOK TWITTER TREND Checking out our 4 PAGE SPREAD in @empiremagazine! Thx @DanJolin! We’re the biggest little #Superman film of 2015! @TDOSLWH (The Death Of…

• AUGUST 1 SHE’S AGENT HAYLEY ATWELL ON WHY SHE JUST GETS CARTER HAYLEY ATWELL’S come a long way since nerves caused her to throw up on her way to audition for the role of peggy Carter in the first Captain America movie. “That must have been a very vomity time for me,” she laughs. “I also threw up on the first day of training.” Since then, the 33 year-old Brit has returned to the no-nonsense British spy across more Marvel movies, a short, and now her own show, Agent Carter, which is finally on UK screens. Not bad for a supposed one-off. “I went on Twitter and noticed there were so many Peggy fans,” she says of the moment she realised Carter was an unstoppable machine. “And a year…

WANT TO KNOW MORE? Then you can check out — of course — all 96 episodes of the HBO show, plus the new totally-written-by-Ari-honest ‘autobiography’, The Gold Standard. EDUCATION Ari studied at Harvard as an undergraduate — his degree programme is unspecified but we know he at least took a class in business ethics. SUITING UP Ari’s Italian power suits are all tailored by designer Domenico Vacca. Off the peg, they start at $4,000. Piven wears them in real life, too. GO IT ALONE Ari is based on real-life agent Ari Emanuel, who started at ICM, then set up his own successful agency, Endeavour, and eventually merged with the William Morris Agency. Not all ten percenters are this successful. Training The big agencies have trainee programmes for which you need…

• DAN BURN-FORTI/CONTOUR BY GETTY I.AGES 1 HE’S THE NEW INBETWEENERS Bad Education, the hit BBC comedy co-written by Whitehall, gets the feature-length treatment this month, with Whitehall’s useless teacher Alfie leading a disastrous school trip. “Our film wouldn’t have been made if The Inbetweeners hadn’t been so successful,” he admits. 2 HE SUFFERS FOR HIS ART The opening scene got Whitehall in some bother in Amsterdam. “One of the kids spikes me with mushrooms and I start running through the streets. In one square a guy decided he was going to make a hero of himself and wrestled me to the ground. My Dutch isn’t great so it was hard to explain. He went in hard.” 3 HE’S IN FROZEN. KINDA Whitehall’s film debut nearly came in Frozen, for…

UNMISSABLE EXCELLENT GOOD POOR TRAGIC Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation OUT NOW / CERT. PG / TBC MINS. DIRECTOR Christopher McQuarrie CAST Tom Cruise, Simon Pegg, Rebecca Ferguson, Alec Baldwin, Jeremy Renner, Ving Rhames, Sean Harris PLOT ETHAN HUNT (CRUISE) AND HIS TEAM MUST GO IT ALONE TO STOP THE SYNDICATE, THE ANTI-IMF, CAUSING GLOBAL CHAOS. “Are you sure, you’re okay to drive?” enquires Benji Dunn (still played with barely supressed gulps of panic by Simon Pegg) to his best friend and indefatigable superspy, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise). “A minute ago you were dead.” Naturally, a barely conscious Hunt is about to do just that: grab the wheel and commence a high-speed chase, comprised of an about-to-be-trashed Beamer and about a dozen enemy motorbikes, through the back streets of Casablanca…

• A.y weArs dress by dolCe & GAbbAnA. .odel weArs vest by CAlvIn KleIn And jeAns by nudIe. • StylIng: AngIe S.Ith, www.AngIeS.Ith.Co.uk. FAShIon ASSIStAntS: DAnIelle whIte.An AnD hAnnAh krAlev. .oDel groo.Ing: PAulA reCAbArren uSIng nuSkIn AnD SChwArzkoPF Pro. • A.y weArs dress by dolCe & GAbbAnA. .odels weAr tux And shIrt by tIGer of sweden And bow-tIe by top.An. BY THE TIME YOU READ THIS, Amy Schumer may be the most famous person in the world. She will perhaps have another armful of awards to go with the ones she’s already won in 2015. She will probably be a box-office star in America. Maybe she will be president of a small country, or have branched out and started curing disease. If you still don’t know who she is then…

YES. WE RIGGED THE DRAW. CHRISTIAN BALE V TOM WELLING Swoon’ome former Abercrombie model Welling wa’ a ’ma’h a’ Clark in 218 epi’ode’ of the excellent Smallville. But, ysknow, hes’ up again’t Bale. Out he goe’. WINNER! CHRISTIAN BALE ROBERT LOWERY V BUD COLLYER s40’ action-man Lowery ’tarred in the New Adventure’ Of Batman And Robin in 1949. But Collyer played Supe’ on radio and in two animated ’erie’. WINNER! BUD COLLYER WILL ARNETT V CHANNING TATUM Tatums’ a charmer a’ the voice of Superman in The LEGO Movie, but Arnett had far more ’creen time and i’ even getting hi’ own LEGO Batman movie in 2017. WINNER! WILL ARNETT VAL KILMER V CHRISTOPHER REEVE Kilmers’ ’ingle appearance a’ the Caped Cru’ader in Batman Forever (1995) wa’ marred by on-’et…

DOUBLE SUNDANCE WINNER. THREE words to strike fear into the heart of any regular multiplex-goer. A catch-all category phrase that at best invokes Bryan Cranston shouting, at worst calls to mind a) aggressive whimsy, b) intense navel-gazing or c) both. But Me And Earl And The Dying Girl is the exception that proves the rule. It’s the story of teenage filmmaker Greg Gaines (Thomas Mann), who is coerced into befriending leukaemia-stricken Rachel (Olivia Cooke). So far, so Fault In Our Stars. But while the A plot peddles a fresh brand of smarts, comedy, satire, poignancy and gut-wrenching emotion, Alfonso Gomez-Rejon’s charmer of an indie also delivers a neat affectionate sideline in movie-buff gamesmanship through the little films made by acned auteur Greg and his “co-worker”, Earl Jackson (RJ Cyler). The…

Screen: A 72” screen can be had for £16.99 on eBay, or get a custom-sized ceiling recessed screen for £3,250 from puretheatre.com. Projector: From £30 secondhand on eBay to £5,849 for a 4k, Sony VPL-VW300ES from richersounds.com. Player: No purchase necessary — if there is an Empire reader without access to a DVD player, Blu-ray player or computer, we will make a hat from a LaserDisc and eat it. Sound system: Three speakers and an amplifier. Your home cinema set-up is fine for small venues; otherwise the Onkyo TX-NR3030 amp and the KEF R100 5.1 speakers come in at £5,348 from sevenoakssoundandvision.co.uk. Venue licence: From £100 annually, or from £10 (Scotland) or £21 (England,Wales; Northern Ireland depends on size of audience) for one-off events, if you’re not serving booze. Film…

House Of Cards: Season 3 FROM NOW / CERT. 15 Placing Kevin Spacey’s devious Frank Underwood up where the buck stops means Beau Willimon’s political drama loses momentum, but it retains its slithery charm in Frank’s dealings with Lars Mikkelsen’s Russian premier and smartly keeps his relationship with wife Claire (Robin Wright) at the core. DJ Sense8 FROM NOW / CERT. 18 It might read like Heroes 2.0, but the Wachowskis’ superhuman series is a more subtle beast. Eight strangers, psychically linked, pop in and out of each other’s minds at will. The whys and hows are explored and a conspiracy unravels, but that takes a back seat to eight discrete character dramas that stand up just as well on their own. JD Wayward Pines FROM NOW / CERT. 15…

The Divergent Series: Insurgent FROM NOW / CERT. 12 The second in this dystopian franchise boasts high-end effects and inane storytelling. Everything barrels along at the same violent, aimless pitch as Shailene Woodley attempts to open the secret box containing the plot to part three. “I know this doesn’t make sense,” she implores, “but you have to trust me.” A big ask. IN The Face Of An Angel FROM NOW / CERT. 15 Michael Winterbottom’s muse on the Meredith Kercher murder trial rather feels like it’s working out what it is as it goes along. It’s not a dramatisation of that case, but an examination of the world’s reaction to that kind of case (all names are changed, m’lud). It keeps asking itself what it’s doing, yet doesn’t answer; still,…

THE GRADY TWINS LISA AND LOUISE BURNS “COME AND PLAY WITH US, DANNY. FOREVER and ever and ever.” If you saw The Shining at a certain age (say, between eight and 80) then these two still terrify, even though their scenes are brief: appearing to Danny (Danny Lloyd) in the corridors of the Overlook Hotel, at first as relatively innocent figures, then later as the bloodied corpses of the girls slaughtered by their father, erstwhile caretaker Grady (Philip Stone). Empire caught up with the pair at The Shining 35 reunion event organised by Howard Berry of The Elstree Project (an oral-history project dedicated to interviewing cast and crew who have worked at Elstree). “It’s strange when people say you’re an icon,” says Louise. “You kind of feel like a statue!”…

The Third Man 1949 / FROM NOW / CERT. PG A richly atmospheric film noir, with a ripe setting (post-War Vienna), a beautifully contorted mystery (pulp writer investigates his childhood friend’s death) and a twist so brilliant it doesn’t matter that it’s spoiled by the cast list (Orson Welles IS the “dead” Harry Lime!), it’s no hyperbole to call The Third Man the best British movie ever made. DJ My Darling Clementine 1946 / FROM AUGUST 10 . CERT. U John Ford’s take on Wyatt Earp is half the length of Kevin Costner’s, but far more memorable. Henry Fonda, Victor Mature and Walter Brennan snarl, quip and shoot with elegance, but the small moments are just as resonant. This deluxe package includes the longer pre-release version, which ends with a…

The Gold Standard: Rules To Rule By AUTHOR ARI GOLD / OUT NOW Like Alan Partridge’s I, Partridge and Ron Burgundy’s Let Me Off At The Top!, this is a pseudo-memoir by a fictional character. The difference is, we’re meant to laugh with , not at, Entourage’s Ari Gold, so the results are significantly less funny. Ari’s braggadocio is a blast when it’s coming from Jeremy Piven; written down, it’s tedious, while his captioned photos are either stills from the show or dodgy Photoshops. AP Taschen’s Favorite TV Shows AUTHOR JURGEN MULLER / OUT NOW This weighty tome (it’s bigger than some actual TVs) is intended to be a binge-watcher’s bible, collating and celebrating the best shows of the past 25 years, from Twin Peaks to Breaking Bad. Beautifully illustrated…

1 Arose Thomas Newman American Beauty 2 .ulholland Drive Angelo Badalamenti Mulholland Drive 3 Just Dropped In (To See What Condition .y Condition Was In) Kenny Rogers & The First Edition The Big Lebowski 4 Old Souls Hans Zimmer Inception 5 Sam Lawry’s 1st Dream/ Brazil Michael Kamen Brazil 6 Dark & Long (Dark Train) Underworld Trainspotting 7 The Nightmare And Dawn Bernard Herrmann Vertigo 8 From Rusholme With Love Mint Royale Vanilla Sky 9 The Rain, The Park & Other Things Cowsills Dumb And Dumber 10 .oving In Stereo The Cars Fast Times At Ridgemont High 11 In Heaven (Lady In The Radiator Song) David Lynch & Alan R. Splet Eraserhead 12 Ballet .usic Sir Thomas Beecham The Red Shoes TO LISTEN TO THE ABOVE, SEARCH ‘EMPIRE MAGAZINEs ON…

FALLOUT SHELTER iOS, ANDROID Part game, part hype-builder for the upcoming Fallout 4, thi’ i’ a fiendi’hly addictive management ’im, a’ the player take’ on the role of admini’trator of a po’t-apocalyptic bomb ’helter, charged with keeping Dweller’ ’afe from the peril’ out’ide. HER STORY iOS An old-’chool, full-motion video game, thi’ interactive ’tory ’tarring Bikini Atoll keyboardi’t Viva Seifert ha’ you analyzing clue’ in dozen’ of police-interview clip’ in a bid to unravel a twi’ted my’tery and ultimately ’olve a crime.…